Kay's Commentary

One thing I found confusing about What The Bleep Do We Know…

2012-02-16T21:13:00.001-05:00

…is the part where the kid tells Maitlin’s character the ball never touched her when he tossed it to her and she claimed to feel pain. If the ball really only bounced off her why did she feel pain and how are diseases spread with hands and other parts of the body? If I place my hand on a hot stove, it doesn’t bounce off and I definitely feel a burn and pain and if I leave it there long enough my skin will burn, possibly melt resulting in serious injury. Why doesn’t my hand bounce off then? I am suppose to think some invisible germ will just leap across this electrical charge from one person to another? I don’t think so.

This brought be to another precipice. If we were all made of a bunch of molecules just bouncing around and we entered outer space where there is no gravity, then we would surely fall apart, just dissipate into all those tiny little atoms and float off. This of course is not the case and since the Mars Rover doesn’t have a soul to keep it together I’d say it is pretty clear atoms and molecules are not bouncing around, they are quite bound to each other like the many chemicals in our bodies such as dopamine which has enabled me to learn from the information I have processed. It has been several years since I saw this film and this issue has been gnawing at me for sometime.

The reason we sometimes appear to gain weight when we are eating a normal diet is for quite different reasons.

Who’s idea was it to put this stuff in our beef?

2012-02-16T18:05:00.001-05:00

American Beef: Why is it Banned in Europe?

These days there is a thin line between Government and Business…

2012-02-16T17:53:00.001-05:00

Kay's Commentary: Less Government is Better…

…most politicians are invested in big business.

North Carolina Government needs an overhaul…

2012-02-16T17:23:00.001-05:00

Since my youth, I have encountered time and time again abuses and arrogance toward the poor in this State. The poor who end up in mental institutions, prison, on welfare, or on the streets. I am one of them.

I have experienced firsthand the attitudes and the greed of those in power. I was physically assaulted by my father and nothing was done; “spare the rod spoil the child”. Since that time my life has been nothing but a series of abuses to my person and my life, I have permitted upon myself. I was the victim of graft in 1990 when I was sent to prison where further harm was inflicted on numerous occasions, used for the second time by a State employee who felt they deserved having their name protected more than I did mine. Lawyers got judgeships, judges moved up the ranks in the courts, writers got their novels and film makers got their movies at my personal expense. I, a mental disabled person, now recovering, who had nothing but television and music programmed into my brain and who was unable to discern the game being played at my expense. No one said anything to me about the machine. Why? The pay-off. Yet. they put themselves out to the public as heroes, Big Brother, saviors of the world, while their dollars are earned off the backs of those of us who have suffered, often times, unspeakable physical injury and unbearable shame in our lives. They call it history and they gladly hand you a check to ease your pain while they rob your mind of all its content. It is clear there are those who cannot help themselves and need help. I commend them for assisting these unfortunates. There are those of us who have had great potential in our lives, whose potential has been stifled by the television, music and other manipulations to insure favoritism to those in power. Look at this Government’s history. Look at the history of other industries. They reveal this truth. Look back before you plunge forward. And in their positions they ride around in limousines paid for with tax dollars, fly all over the world for some obscure reason and then with their earnings from public dollars they send their children to private schools and institutions of higher learning they created with our money and they end up with the federal jobs. Power is truly in the hands of the majority but it is also in the hands of consumers. When we vote, for four years we are at the mercy of what they do or fail to do unless we take action against these abuses in our Government and stop acting in ways which promote these problems in our personal lives and communities.

Kent State was nothing more than a ploy to keep people from rebelling against the realities of our Government and what they intended doing to us and to thwart masses of young people from attending colleges who would later acquire jobs Big Brother coveted for their own children. It was not an experiment, it was a tool, it is a tool, a tool used to control and manipulate the population. A tool to make you think the way they want you to think, not to see things the way they are. If you did you wouldn’t indulge your money or time. Some of the best minds in our country have been usurped by the machine, to the detriment of themselves, the advancement of their communities, their States and our Country.

Take for example, small time loan companies. They aren’t about helping people, they are about getting your money and your property and they hide behind the law to do it. There seems to be nothing you can do because of the fine print on the bottom of the contract they conveniently forget to tell you to read before you sign and you sit there, a disabled person unable to work, believing they are trying to help you. Months later they take your property. They saw the writing on the wall. Now I see the writing on the wall. It is becoming even more clear to me our Government has been backing these little companies all over the State. Who has the funds to support these companies? People with money. They know before they loan you any money they aren’t going to lose a dime. If they do they write it off on taxes and they choose to whom they are going to lose that money.

Those who have known about the television are surely aware of the mentality of the people who view it. They are culpable. They have taken advantage of this poor mentality under the guise of protecting us like a big brother. We have nothing except what they choose to dole out to us because of the way we spend our time and money. They care nothing for creating jobs which suit our needs. They need us to spend the dollars they shell out to us as if it is all their money. Who makes them rich? Consumers. We become slaves to consuming. There are those of us who work hard to get ahead sometimes failing at some point in our journey. Is it an accident? They make us slaves to their will. This slavery is over.

There are those who are employed with the State who have shirked their responsibilities to the people and heave their personal problems and criminal deeds onto ignorant citizens, using imprisonment to cover up their actions, hiding behind immunity laws, they created. I discover they are responsible for half my problems but immunity prevents me from exercising my rights against them. We who elect them get the short end of the deal. Where is government by the people for the people? Are we not people? No, they see us as nothing more than human resources, a slick way of calling us slaves. We give them these jobs thinking they are near sainthood, those of us who are good and go to church on Sunday and believe in the lord, and believe they are looking out for our best interests. We project our good nature onto them while they rob us. As good citizens wanting to help our communities and States we participate in psychological testing, filling out questionnaires, giving them knowledge about us. It’s just the power they need to control and manipulate us in our spending robbing us of our chance in the free market. Why are places like loan shark companies allowed to exist if they are looking out for our best interests? Government has forgotten they are paid servants of the people. As one who executes the desires of the many, wouldn’t it be their responsibility to make the people aware of problems since the minds and brains of the many have been hijacked by a machine that wasn’t even invented in this country? Then and only then, do they spout rhetoric on the exercise of freedom and free will. They rob us of our lives while we are mesmerized by the machine and we rarely discover what they have done until long after it has happened. We rely on the machine to tell us the truth rather than looking for it ourselves. Even the news seems to have been corrupted. Why didn’t the news media tell us about “black money”? Millions of dollars spent to entertain foreign dignitaries and trillions of dollars we owe to China or so we are made to believe. Who is monitoring our Governments?

Now as I sit here writing this I find there have been few changes in our society since Queen Victoria reigned the United Kingdom. These are the problems which plagued society then and they are plaguing us now. What has changed? They are getting us to abuse our own minds and bodies under the guise of some great American experiment and these industries have become so powerful it is likely nothing will change unless we support each other in this effort. And even if you never indulged in this media it is perspicuous one can become infected with its ideas simply by the nature of our society. Reflecting on that history has made it all to obvious there are those then who used methods to control others which has grown into a more powerful medium through television, music and books, dissuading us from our future goals and often encouraging us to harm ourselves. And in some pseudo-effort to expose us to and make us aware of these methods, we have become victims of them just as Timothy McVeigh was a victim of the ideas in Turner Diaries and what he witnessed at Waco, then by this exposure we are programmed to abuse our own minds, permitting them to exploit us further by gaining access to more of our earnings, life savings, our thoughts and ideas. 150 years of experience has changed nothing. Why? These people have not been punished for the harm they have caused, in a way so as to alter the course of our future. They have blinded us to the truth. It will continue if they are permitted to abuse our minds and bodies without punishment.

Re: Narcissism…

2012-02-13T02:36:00.001-05:00

Kay's Commentary: Do television programs, books or music cause homosexuality?

I have read numerous books on narcissism (self love), most purporting it as an unhealthy negative aspect of a personality. It has become clear to me this is a distortion and the pay-off is even more clear. It is part of the gross manipulation of humanity and the human mind. Does this mean one will become an eternal child? No. One will become what one puts into one’s brain and creates in one’s mind. If you think of yourself or cause others to think of yourself as a trash can, then one will be treated this way. Most of us are familiar with these ideas. “As a man thinketh, so he is”, Emmett Fox, or becomes.

Do television programs, books or music cause homosexuality?

2012-02-13T02:06:00.001-05:00

Neurolinguistic Programming

Homosexuality, from my understanding is not unfavorable, it is the prelude to narcissism, a necessary stage in human psychological development. It can become unhealthy if not properly guided or can be delayed by unhealthy television programs, books or music. Averting libidinal energies usually employed for mental development does not cause homosexuality, it delays it. I drew an affirmative conclusion television can influence sexual development after reading Age of Manipulation, The Sin in Sincere and the Con in Confidence, by Brian Wilson Keys as well as from my own personal experiences, in that television and advertising do not promote homosexuality but actually misdirects libidinal energies toward that which the television presents through characters and promotes through advertising. I think television, books and music can be a major influence on sexual behavior just as pornography can and does influence sexual acting out.

In my case numerous traumas were perpetrated upon my person which I either re-enacted or came from outside sources, driven by the desires of the abusers (who may have indulged in pornography) or were also reenactments from traumas in their lives, in addition to my own television viewing, book reading and music which averted my energies and corrupted my thinking and thus my life. I once believed the lack of breast feeding was the source of my failures and lack of achievement, but have since discovered television, music and books have had a greater impact. I later discovered The Story of O possibly influenced the perpetrator of one of my childhood molestations, the other likely a re-enactment.

Lots of television programs, books and music can through dialogue and the ideas presented, inhibit one’s development. Some programs can and do impose ideas in the brain and mind, which given the right set of circumstances in a person’s life, cause serious harm or can bring about a healing, depending on which programs one views on the television. Scary, horror and violent programs do have a negative impact on human behavior, especially if one is not accustomed to such programming bringing about more developmental difficulties.

If the mind is bogged down with lots of dialogue from a film or book, be it scary or not, and one has an undeveloped mind, then disaster can befall that person because the mind is not trained to cope with its content and synaptic connections in the brain are not there to prevent re-enacting what has been put into the mind. The brain does not just learn from what it sees but what it hears. One faculty of the brain does not take precedent over the other unless one or the other is not working. They work in unison. We laugh at children when they play act different things, we know as adults came from the television, or some book or a song, (what I am talking about), but is it really funny. In these situations one has no choice but to relinquish control of one’s libidinal energies to a writer for help. Sometimes familial situations force or promote the use of television, books or music, instead of seeking appropriate help or that help is simply unavailable. In these cases many young adults identify with characters on the television, in books or through music, who they think resemble proper adult behavior or behavior they like. Even proper behavior viewed on the television can easily be projected away from the self just as God sent Satan into the world, as this has been programmed into us to do for generations and projecting was once the purpose of the television to get one to project unfavorable content away from the self, or to project projections from others, away from the self. First we were seduced by the television and its programs, then we were tricked into believing the television was evil and with it went the good parts of ourselves or the upper class potential in us all portrayed in many films, projected onto others-the good people in the programs we watched-leaving many of us to feel like criminals, given to alcoholism, drug addicts, addicted to cigarettes, obsessed with sex and food, hopeless, worthless and bound for hell.

In my case rebelling at times saved me from falling prey to that which controlled the behavior of my parents, the television, books and music. What happened? I could not be without one or the other of them and I then became enmeshed with the lives of those trying to help clean up the mess who clearly indulged in one or the other.

I might also be the reincarnation of a soul who was accustomed to re-enacting (acting out as in a play) things or a soul who was traumatized before my birth (“life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get”) and for whatever reason was unable to uncover the source of their psychiatric difficulties. This in no way takes away from my having been traumatized but certainly gives legitimate explanation for why it happened. It is easy to see from this point of view how one can mistakenly become possessed of a soul different from one’s physical sex or even in opposition to one’s future desires. So, it is easy to deduce from my personal experience, Neurolinguistic Programming a Case of Helping or Hurting, that television, books and music do have an impact on thinking and the mental development of those who indulge and affects those with whom indulgers are connected through family or other associations.

One can believe what I have stated or one can certainly indulge and find out for one’s self what can and does happen.

What I think about hypnosis re: The Woman in Green…

2012-01-29T17:07:00.001-05:00

I think hypnosis is a laymen’s way of describing and demonstrating the effects of psychic connections. It is clearer to me, the subject in the film, The Woman In Green, is the object of many projections and the man who is performing the hypnosis is likely a doctor in the audience performing some surgery, parts of which they are acting out on the stage, while demonstrating the hypnotic technique. In the scene with Watson it is clear he is being hypnotized but it is highly unlikely he would perform the feats put into his brain, so quickly. It would likely take several days or even weeks before such an event would manifest it self, except in the case of myself in which it is clear I was acting out the current thoughts in the mind of another, created from the viewing of the film, while other acting out may have been historical. I was possessed of the right brain thinking of one of my parents or some neighbor or even some relative.

Since writing the NLP article, I discovered my mother was only 9 years old when this film was released if the date 1945 is accurate. It is highly likely my mother may have stepped on a nail herself and I re-enacted her trauma as the result of the film. As you can see it is also possible my mother may have been acting out the movie viewing of others from say, New York, which then presented the problem in our family.

Less Government is Better…

2012-01-27T23:20:00.001-05:00

Video - Breaking News Videos from CNN.com

…What happens when a large group of people are not policed? Chaos? If this happens I see an increasingly escalating cost of living for our future.

I clearly recollect 30 years ago when military were called in at Kent State to control what started out as a peaceful protest ending in the murdering of innocent lives. I for one find that rather confusing when you claim the private sector and businesses should be in control of the economics in this country. The University felt so intimidated by a group of students making a political statement they had to call in troops with automatic weapons used against UNARMED YOUNG ADULTS barely in their 20’s. THAT MAKES NO SENSE. YET, YOU WANT BUSINESS TO RUN THIS COUNTRY? THAT IS WHY WE ARE IN THE MESS WE ARE IN NOW, BIG BUSINESS HAS MANIPULATED THE MINDS OF SO MANY I NEVER KNOW IF I AM MAKING A DECISION FOR MYSELF OR SOMEONE ELSE’S POCKETBOOK.

I see a business operated USDA milking millions of dollars from caring consumers to keep their food supply appropriately monitored. I have perused numerous articles online made available by private research companies and those presented to the public on research by our government. I trust those I read from the Government over the ones I read from private companies who are also promoting the sale of products they likely research and sell to the public. The Better Business Bureau is an example of business monitoring itself. I can name numerous products marketed right now that should be removed from shelves because they are hazardous to our health. Innocent people who lack enough of the right knowledge can be conned into buying these products ending up hurting themselves because of the poor distribution of adequate information about the products the businesses are selling to the public and if they did consumers would not buy them. This is how business is going to save America’s economy?

Neurolinguistic Programming, a case of helping or hurting…

2012-01-24T04:59:00.001-05:00

This article has been revised to include later posts and is published here…

NLP

This is not about resisting authority, this is about equating authority with slavery…

2012-01-21T15:09:00.001-05:00

Hulu - Beyond Scared Straight: Oakland County, MI (Girls) - Watch the full episode now.

…it is a rebellion against slavery and abuse. This is about trauma. This program to me does not resolve the real issue in the psyche. Children are not slaves, they are dependents. They are dependent on adults and others more wise than themselves, to teach them how to live successfully.

I am opposed to this approach to tackling the problem yet I can see that there are many out there who cannot be reached unless they are treated this way first. I know this from my own personal experience.

Gaining this awareness cost me a lot of synapses, a lot of time and money…

2012-01-21T01:16:00.001-05:00

Kay's Commentary: Neurolinguistic Programming, a case of helping or hurting…updated

…if you have any complaints about my disability talk to these people.

Visions this AM – The subconscious mind at work…

2012-01-12T15:02:00.001-05:00

I woke up at 10 AM and fell back asleep. I noticed my heart sounded funny like it was squishing instead of thumping. Then I drifted deeper into sleep. I was in some kind of shop. It sold alcoholic beverages. It looked like part of it was in the ground or an old abandoned house. There was part that was covered by some sort of drape but it had been pulled to the side. I went in and looked to the left and there were at least 11 pictures on the wall, black and white. They looked like designs at first, could be an eye chart or pictures of someone. I was with someone and they seemed to be in a hurry so I was unable to stop and focus on the images. I did see some unusually large funnel shaped cups piled up, looked like drinking mugs to me, I used my measuring cup sometime earlier in the day. I have a porcelain coffee filter but does not have a handle, this had a handle. I was at SS a day ago and looked at a vase that was shaped similarly, more like an old ice cream soda glass. I had gotten a small demitasse sized cup of coffee and a chocolate as I usually do. The cup is paper, no handles. Everything was sort of hazy. I was with a heavier person blond, looked like the guy who once worked at SS. He purchased a six pack of something and we all left and got into a small car. There were three of us and I got into the back seat. The blond got into the passenger side. We headed off and he handed me a bottle of something and said, “try this”. The liquid looked cloudy and I didn’t really taste anything. It looked like a Mickey’s or Smirnoff. I have created a mix that looks like it, must have triggered memories of seeing the Smirnoff in the Harris Teeter. Then I was standing outside a set of something and someone who looked like Annette Funicello was seated on a brick wall, reminded me of the wall at the convenient store on Rosemary Street here. I had seen an old Avalon Funicello film. I had been there before in my waking life but had never seen this happen. It seemed dark and I must have been walking up to the place. There was another person standing in front of her and they were talking. Things seemed to go dark and I heard her crying oh, oh, she had fallen off backwards from the wall onto the pavement. Then I was back in the car and I slumped over in the back seat. I heard, “she’s dead”.

I guess Monsanto doesn’t understand free market…

2012-01-10T21:05:00.001-05:00

Monsanto's Harvest of Fear | Politics | Vanity Fair

…or is there a free market anymore? If there is one thing I can’t stand it’s businesses like Monsanto who bully other hard working people who prefer to sit in a nice rocking chair on their front porch at the end of the day in their clean coveralls enjoying the sunset or a starlit night.

They were probably trying to size up Rhinehart to see if they could walk all over him and eventually take his store. You see, plant a seed like that in someone’s mind and next you have them coughing up seeds and money trying to stay on the good side of the law and out of trouble. It isn’t just their practice of modifying seeds which may be beneficial to us, it’s how they poison your mind with their thinking. There’s nothing to stop farmers from hiring their own scientists to work on safely improving seeds without having to patent them making it impossible for small farmers to survive in the end.

If no one is supporting them, how are they still in business?

On the contrary SCIAM, it seems to say to me these people have clear psychic boundaries…

2012-01-08T19:13:00.001-05:00

Out-of-Body Experiences Linked with Poor Sense of Own Body: Scientific American

…and when they are breached they know it and they might even let you know it. It can also be dangerous to one’s health as in there is a potential for death if it isn’t managed or interceded.

I have been having them frequently as I do not drive a car and walk most everywhere. I get lifted out of my current state all the time, it is irritating and irresponsible and a lot of work to try and retrieve it when there are lots of enmeshments. I’d also go so far as to say it is those who lift others who are unhappy with themselves and not the one having the out of body experience.

Common Brain Mechanisms Underlie Supernatural Perceptions: Scientific American

2012-01-06T12:52:00.001-05:00

Common Brain Mechanisms Underlie Supernatural Perceptions: Scientific American

I suppose you think this - What’s In Kay’s Mind - is some supernatural phenomenon also, SCIAM. You are denying psychic connections to your own family? Everyone knows about that, unless you have a developmental disability.

Superconscious – Supernatural perceptions do exist outside the brain, I have had them and they did not always come from my brain. Infant, child, adolescent, adult, parent, grandparent – unconscious, subconscious, preconsious, conscious, superconscious, supraconscious (cosmic consciousness), and so on…

I do believe there is an inner progression of information processing that goes on in the brain, which can also be related to consciousness and some information can give rise to what seems like supernatural phenomenon. I think this kind of experience is not supernatural but from not being able to relate information that was taken in at some earlier date which one has been unable to connect to for whatever reason. Supernatural to me would be the information which was taken in and processed by one’s parents or grandparents. If one loses a parent or grandparent then everything shifts to the next level. My father lost his sight when I was not quite 10 years old so it is unlikely I would have had any visions at all from him after that time but I assure you a blind man does have visions. My mother was an avid TV viewer and I have had all sorts of visions and experiences. She did remarry when I was in my 20’s after my father’s death (this could all have happened in someone else’s life in at a previous time in history) and I have had visions and experiences of what he has seen on TV as well as in the world.

I have to wonder why they didn’t police Paul McCartney and Wings in their return to the US in 1974…

2011-12-30T12:47:00.001-05:00

…I was there, the Mob Police were not. They should have been.

When I went to college three years later I was unable to complete my course work for fear of being shot or beaten up if I thought or acted in opposition to some puritanical notion inflicted by those in power, "we will have law and order". In response to that fear I started drinking and taking drugs. The use of marijuana was not some Satanic ploy by some occult to bring me down to a level of evil, it was my own government supporting the Jews.

Kay's Commentary

One World Religion…revised

2011-12-30T12:21:00.001-05:00

…churches that all look alike, patrons all wearing the same clothes on Sunday, hearing the same sermons across the land. One religion, makes it easier to rebel against!

HE WHO CONTROLS THE PEOPLE CONTROLS THE MONEY. YOU WANT YOUR MONEY IN GOD’S POCKET? Beware those who set themselves up as Gods. I want to control my self. I can do for myself exactly what these self appointed Gods claim to do for me. I can love myself and there is no sin in it, no matter what someone else has done to me. I don’t have to wait for God or Jesus to come down from the cross, take my hand and lead me wherever I want to go. I control my own destiny and if I want to pour my money into all of these “Gods” who control me I am free to do this.

We are a country who has seen war after war and death from disease. We know violence leads us to destruction and death. We haven’t existed for 300 years without learning this, yet we act as if we are still blind. We might be angry but why are we angry? We put our money and hopes into something that has let us down, cheated us and misused us. It is time to wake up. Jesus came for the Jews, who needs him. We are all special, SO ACT THE PART.

Music in the background of this video is from the film Death in Love…

2011-12-29T17:09:00.001-05:00

I recall the Kent State scenes on the news trying to intimidate students protesting what was being done unfairly. When I went to college three years later I was unable to complete my course work for fear of being shot or beaten up if I thought or acted in opposition to some puritanical notion inflicted by those in power, "we will have law and order". In response to that fear I started drinking and taking drugs. The use of marijuana was not some Satanic ploy by some occult to bring me down to a level of evil, it was my own government.

“Walk this way, talk this way”, is certainly an attempt at controlling your behavior, that short message gets into the brain and then you start watching how other people are walking, literally, while some may become aware of how other people are conducting their lives. Think of lines of people waiting to get into a concert!

LOOKING FOR A SCAPEGOAT?

2011-12-29T01:04:00.001-05:00

Kay's Commentary: Since SCIAM brought up the question…

Nor did I connect my LSD experience with Woman in Green or any of the other films I found which employ hypnosis…

2011-12-29T00:59:00.001-05:00

Kay's Commentary: I never connected Stepford Wives with the Sherlock Holmes film Woman in Green until I wrote the Commentary post…

…it was the LSD and then the PCP that put me onto the potential problem but then I was so busy trying to get through college (which never happened) and making a living that I never had the time nor energy to sit down and figure it out.

After taking the LSD I saw “sleep” pass before my eyes like a ticker tape. This was 1974. It just doesn’t seem like something that would have come from that film but who knows, something my mind created from the dialogue.

If that’s really true I surely would be concerned about any surgeon cutting into my body for any reason…

2011-12-27T13:31:00.001-05:00

Your brain plays tricks on you.

An Artist Reveals How He Tricks the Eyes | Streams of Consciousness, Scientific American Blog Network

Since SCIAM brought up the question…

2011-12-23T01:36:00.001-05:00

Kay's Commentary: This is an interesting question coming from a group of people who killed

Killing 1 Person to Save 5: Scientific American Podcast

Uh, I thought that’s why we had television so we reduce crime and killing. I know know that’s not what the article is about but it opened the door for me to air my recent thoughts. Does killing one save many? For the moment in the experiment it does but then the train runs smack into one coming in the opposite direction or some other catastrophe happens moments later and they all die. Is this really a test of whether a person would actually kill 1 to save 5? How many people are going to be walking on a train track? Unless a person is drugged up or intoxicated you would likely not find anyone on a train track but you might feel a little less guilty about it if they were a derelict drug addict or alcoholic. Then six birds have been killed with a handful of stones. Killing, it’s an obsession. It’s an ugly word and should be stricken from the American language. This particular idea has been written about before and I think it’s nothing more than a scare tactic personally.

It occurred to me recently a society such as ours with a history of war and media which inundates society with violence and death becomes indifferent to the suffering of others and indifferent to death and killing. And it has just occurred to me the souls, if there are any who survived the Little Ice Age would surely be among those particularly indifferent to killing and even consuming another human being. I’d say there are lots of people out there wanting and willing to kill another human being whether they save 5 others or not. We’ve certainly witnessed this in our history as well and with respect to the many mass shootings which have happened in this country I say the article has the sensitivity of a slug.

This is an interesting question coming from a group of people who killed

2011-12-23T00:34:00.001-05:00

Killing 1 Person to Save 5: Scientific American Podcast

…hundreds of thousands of Native American Indians and amongst them after WWII thousands of others who were involved in the Holocaust.

What’s the pay-off for averting ones attention from the self…?

2011-12-17T12:09:00.001-05:00

People who don't care—or don't need to care—what others think of them show how crucial reputation is to civilization. Understanding it could reduce crime, improve ethical behavior and rein in Wall Street excesses

How to Act Like a Psychopath without Really Trying [Excerpt]: Scientific American

…I really don’t care about what other people think about me because they are going to think what they want and project it onto whoever is in the line of fire. More important than what others think of me is what I think about myself. The State has labeled me a criminal. They’ve finger printed me, photographed me, and labeled me. I am, we are the objects of all the police force. the psychologists and psychiatrists have been taught about criminals. All those thoughts they have about criminals get conjured up in their minds and they have to have someone to stick them to besides themselves so they can continue to be the good guys. This is what a State does to its citizens when they are immune to punishment. It’s just like God casting Satan into the world. I was forced into the position of the criminal object of all the crime shows I had viewed on television, most of it was cleaned up. Now tell me the television keeps crime down. If it did why would it need to be cleaned up?

The reason I have survived is because I never believed I was a criminal and still believe I am a good law abiding citizen. Things happen, enmeshments happen and this is true for others as well. This does not mean there are no people out there who have no concern for human life. That’s because they have not been shown concern for human life. One should read Fairbairn and The Origins of Object Relations and see Thicker Than Water.

I also think its the negative thoughts we think about others that is the source of psychopathy, not what others think of us, and generally one might say that one’s negative thoughts about the self might get projected onto others which means one is likely a good person but unable to deal with some negative aspect of the personality.

Pay-offs, that was a big word in EST Training. Never did EST but knew lots of people in AA who did. I did read a publication promoted by EST on accountability. The pay-off for those AAers having me read that book was their drunkalogues had been sent out into the minds of others, mine included so they left me with the problem to deal with while they run around with their facades of dignity and uprightness. Psychopathy at its finest.

About one in every 100 people doesn’t care what others think of him. These people are hard to spot. They are usually physically healthy, and their intelligence is often above average. Yet, in the words of one psychiatrist, they lie without compunction, cheat, steal, and casually violate any and all norms of social conduct whenever it suits their whim. They have no concern for others’ suffering, no remorse when caught, and punishment does little to change them. They are called psychopaths.

It isn’t just Wall Street. I know a lot of writers who fit the description above. I have also discovered this mentality in the lowliest corporate positions, sales. Salesman selling people anything, even if it will harm them, so they can get their monthly bonus check. Is it the way of the world? We’ve been entrained to project evil into the world or onto others. We’ve been more entrained to project the good from ourselves and onto others while we appear the bad guys. Many NLP books I have perused I discover are doing just that, using the consumer and reader to do the work of others.

I have been entrained by my earliest training in the Girl Scouts to do my duty. That may have been interpreted by others as becoming a criminal in their eyes. It isn’t comfortable, nice or fun and I cannot even imagine another human being who does not have some positive concern for another human being no matter how angry they might be over something. It just is not fathomable to me. I am one among millions so psychopaths do not rule the world and we are safe in numbers.

I never connected Stepford Wives with the Sherlock Holmes film Woman in Green until I wrote the Commentary post…

2011-12-15T23:05:00.001-05:00

What's In Kay's Mind?: Saw this – looking for clues…

… Neurolinguistic Programming, a case of helping or hurting, but after my recent viewing of Stepford Wives, it is clear they were finding out someone (me possibly or my mother or any other female who may have seen Woman in Green) was projecting that part of the self away from themselves. First the WIG is projected onto one of Joanna’s twin girls signified by her green blouse she is wearing when she gets onto the school bus for the first time. This was acted out in my youth when I gave away my Barbie doll, which looked like the WIG, to my sister one Christmas and was symbolic of my projecting it onto my sister and it was likely projected onto me from one of my Aunts or Mother or some unknown. It was also further re-enacted between my sister and brother when my sister chased by brother around the house with her Chatty Kathy (Kathy Hall, the writer?) doll that talked – the scene in which she lured Holmes to her apartment – there could also be scenes between my Aunt and Uncle.

Then WIG is transferred to an automobile, a green station wagon, prompting me to write a short mechanimorphic (for lack of a better word to describe the essay) kind of essay on someone’s erotic feelings about a woman described as an automobile. I wrote it in the 90’s. This nicely written essay has been misplaced and I have not located it as of yet (lots of papers to go through) or it is lost. This was brought out in Adam Curtis’ film Century of the Self, when marketers bought into Bernays’ ideas about how to get at the consumer via his most innate drives and desires and exploit them. This transference prompted our family to purchase a light green 60’s model Chevrolet and then in 1970 a green Plymouth, a deeper green than the Chevrolet (must go deeper) and then Kay purchased her own car a green Volkswagon. The woman in green, the seductress had now become something other than a woman, she became an automobile. Every man who watched that film would likely have been attracted to the woman in green. It is evident in my family.

This is how only a small group can become so very powerful. I feel certain this is someone from New York with whom my father may have had a psychic connection during the war. He was stationed on Long Island in 1939 before shipping out to Long Beach and then the Pacific to Iwo Jima and Okinawa.

_____________________

I also wore the usual Army green issue while enlisted in the US Army in 1974-75. While I had many issues to deal with in my youth, it is clear this film and other films like it may have contributed to others thinking I was a lesbian. I never thought of myself as a lesbian. I never thought of myself as being in the wrong body, I just never entertained those ideas. Once after I heard about Christine Jorgenson, I thought about changing my sex, but it was because I was angry, but I wasn’t just angry at my father, but men and my mother and at that point in the Army, women too. I was just plain angry and it got worse and the anger grew into a big rage that I took out on myself making my body sick.

Right now I among many, feel as if I have been chosen as the sacrifice for every evil thing done to another. I am tired of it.

What is a paradox…

2011-12-14T22:36:00.001-05:00

What, exactly, is a paradox?

After reading this article I had to conclude either I didn’t really know what a paradox was and I had been confused or I did know and the Oxford article was erroneously penned, maybe deliberately.

I had to view Women in Green to discover what happened and what caused me to become hypnotized, risking being hypnotized again and using the same deductive reasoning Holmes did to find the cause and get myself out of the situation. This is what I think a paradox is really all about, it is like the Ouroboros or a Mobius or the symbol for infinity. In the film Holmes recovered from a hypnotic induction with the help of a pill, to save himself and capture the criminals and is sort of prophetic for the viewer.

I met a man about 4 years ago named Bob Ross, a mathematician, also Jewish…

2011-12-14T16:47:00.001-05:00

Unconscious or really conscious…

2011-12-14T15:42:00.001-05:00

described more generally in the realm of cognitive neuroscience as any processing that does not give rise to conscious awareness

Probing the Unconscious Mind: Scientific American

This is what is depicted in the film Matrix, when Neo is dodging bullets and stopping himself from falling and all the other psychic things he and the others did. He left the world of immediate awareness and entered a world where he knew every move that was going to be made before it happened, a world where the mind is faster than the brain and the brain is said to be able to click off 400 thoughts every second. This is how Einstein discovered the atom and how probably Blake and others discovered it before Einstein when he and others employed stippling in their engravings, they simply were not focused on what they were doing in the way Einstein had focused his attention to the atom. Who knows, maybe Einstein really got his original idea from an engraving. Maybe atom was really Adam.

The experiment proves my point that the brain does take in all that is around it especially if one is focused elsewhere. It always seems that when I am looking for something I lost that I always find it when I stop focusing on trying to find it. This is how I uncovered, the Women in Green film and what it was doing to me. I was not looking to uncover anything sinister in that film since I was a fan of Sherlock Holmes films in my youth. Of course I had become trained, by that time, to think like an investigator. I think the film was already there in the minds of the many who have viewed it and it was simply projected onto me, as I purchased the green coat first and I discovered the film later, which laid open the entire problem to my own personal awareness. I had personally related the green coat to being a sage and I did not want to be a sage, so it is clear someone was projecting and someone was thinking that film had hypnotized them. Were they behaving like they were hypnotized because they thought they were or were they really hypnotized? Stepford Wives would have certainly dissociated that part of the self out onto others which would explain why I ended up being the object of someone’s projection and the intent of the film is clear by all of the green things I later purchased and the cars my family purchased. My viewing the Stepford Wives protected me from these projections for a time. Only when I focused my attention on what the film was doing after seeing it, did I uncover these things.

Simple mathematical calculations are no great feat for the human mind, especially if one is a mathematician. Given a specific sum of money and then told to spend only a specific amount, without having to physically add and subtract, can be done. I have done it. I have been to the store and physically weighed out a single pound of beans numerous times without actually weighing it on the scale. This I am not consciously aware of and if I focused all my attention on trying to do it I might fail or if someone tampers with my mind that might cause me to fail. Since my father’s relatives owned stores in their past, it is clear this is a feat that has been cultivated and passed on from generation to generation, but someone had to be aware of it and focused on it first.

Something which is completely hidden from the brain cannot be processed and therefore will not become part of the realm of the mind, at least that is my understanding of it. Subliminal messages work by permitting the message to enter the brain without being detected consciously. It is only after the message has taken hold of the mind can one hope to become conscious of it, how Woman in Green was so effective, then there are other variables which must be present to permit that consciousness according to my experiences.

So are these things really unconscious or are we really conscious of these things, we simply do not focus our attention to them all the time and the way I understand what I have learned about the brain and mind, how we act upon this unconscious awareness depends on our earliest life experiences and training.

Is this something that happened on the set of Woman in Green…

2011-12-13T21:39:00.001-05:00

…or in the film or at a party?

More green things in my apartment…

2011-12-13T21:25:00.001-05:00

The rangehood is from the 60’s avocado kitchen…I did have a green refrigerator and stove of course I did not pick that out and I think there was asbestos in the bottom of the fridge.

Other green things in my apartment as of this post…

2011-12-13T17:59:00.001-05:00

Neurolinguistic Programming, a case of helping or hurting…updated | Kay's Commentary

Artwork in 1976 and 1992…

What's In Kay's Mind?: I never connected Stepford Wives with the Sherlock Holmes film Woman in Green until I wrote the Commentary post…

2011-12-12T18:44:00.001-05:00

What's In Kay's Mind?: I never connected Stepford Wives with the Sherlock Holmes film Woman in Green until I wrote the Commentary post…

My thinking on Freud based on viewing A Question of God…

2011-12-10T18:23:00.001-05:00

In this presentation it was mentioned that Freud and his father were verbally assaulted by an anti-semitic passerby who knocked his father’s hat onto the street, in Sigmond’s youth. Freud’s father did nothing, leaned over, picked up his hat and walked on with his son.

I think this must have been very emasculating for a young and immature Freud to witness, probably wanting his father to punch the passerby in the mouth. It may have caused Freud to direct his libido toward his mother resulting in his falling in love with her rather than his father. Freud was rather trapped at this point because he could not actually be like his mother physically and being a woman she too was likely not too aggressive. He was searching for someone to show him it was ok to be a man in the physical sense, a macho man, that it was ok to show some aggression. This he apparently only found in those who did not like his nationality and was resolved by running away from them. I surmise Freud’s civil discontent was with his father’s lack of action and thus himself which led to his use of and addiction to cocaine.

I suggest his cigar smoking was symbolic of many different things in Freud’s life, mainly his attitude toward his father, also why I think he began a search for Moses, who Freud may have thought to be the most masculine of his people. I also think his daughter was the only one who kept Freud stable after the death of his wife, yet still kept him from his right of passage to manhood and may have even acted out some of his past. Was Freud suicidal? If he was it was likely in his youth and he was probably dying from embarrassment.

I also think his cigar smoking was astutely though wrongfully transferred to many women in this country via Edward Bernays and his cigarette campaign to empower women. Though his father’s actions may have been a detriment to the young Freud they were very wise. One only has to entertain thoughts about what might have happened if he had struck out at the anti-semitic to know his lack of action was in the best interest of both himself and the young Freud. Some legal action at the time, would have been quite appropriate if available, to protect themselves from harm.

Wreckless seems an understatement…

2011-12-08T11:54:00.001-05:00

Bottom Line - Corzine: I don't know where missing MF money is

Re-hypothecation? What I see is a plain waste of tax payer dollars investigating this fraud. A law was passed after the fact that investors money could not be used to buy bed debts? It should never have been done from the outset. The money is in Europe, where a lot more of US dollars are ending up, why they have huge expensive locks and flood control devices and Louisiana gets nothing but some cheap cement pilons because we no longer have the money. I have a feeling Holocaust victims are at the root of this activity. Their guilt trip has been going on since I was born. It’s infected a lot of people. They are doing the same thing here they did over there.

I AM AN AMERICAN. MY FAMILY CAME HERE 250 YEARS BEFORE THE HOLOCAUST. I OWE HOLOCAUST VICTMS NOTHING.

I told them this would happen when those carpet baggers started flooding this country. They brought their trouble over here. NOW OUR JOBS AND MONEY ARE OVER THERE.

Just look at the film Black Swan. That film cost $13 million dollars. Where was it? Not in the set I can assure you. It has grossed $106 million dollars.

High fat high protein diets for cold climates…

2011-12-07T17:10:00.001-05:00

…not better for people living in milder climates. Brown fat helps keep the body warmer. Could this be where Atkins got mixed up?

Bears pack on the fat and hibernate during the winter. Eskimos have a higher body fat content than someone who lives in the Caribbean. That’s what permits them to survive the frigid temperatures in Alaska, living in igloos for many months. Blue whales do a similar thing I think. They pack on fat for the colder waters in which they live.

Masturbation…

2011-11-28T22:20:00.001-05:00

…was once thought to be a problem, then it was thought to be a cure for hysteria. Then all these women started masturbating which caused acting out. They acted out all sorts of things but the hysteria was gone. This is how I think the Ripper victims lost their lives. The US Surgeon General said it was ok, I think it’s a death sentence for some.

I think I have more of a problem with how writers report on celebs and their children than I do about transgendered individuals…

2011-11-24T00:08:00.001-05:00

Transgender youth, in particular, are at disproportionate risk for depression, suicide, substance abuse, HIV and sexually transmitted diseases, according to the Family Acceptance Project.

Page 2: Transgender Son of Warren Beatty, Annette Bening Slams Chaz Bono - ABC News

…because I don’t understand why a transgendered person would become depressed, suicidal or abuse substances after they’ve made a decision to alter their sexual identities if it makes them feel better about who they really are as a personality. If they are doing it for acceptance from others, then it seems they have done it for the wrong reasons. It’s like being an alcoholic and trying to stay sober for someone else. After awhile you begin to resent the person for whom you are doing it and slip back into drinking or something worse.

I think there was a period in our psychological development as a group of people, in which a healthy narcissism was considered an illness or frowned upon, or in various instances was overshadowed by transferences of self loathing or hatred of one sex or the other, particularly during fragile periods of development. In writing about the film Woman in Green I was made aware for the first time what they meant about parts of the self and good mom, bad mom, good dad, bad dad, in terms of the parts of myself and how family history played its role in the development of personality. Reading Jungian psychology did not help me become more conscious about that because of the terms used to describe it. But when I realized I was contaminating myself with things that were not necessarily helping me, it hit me about how a multiple personality could develop and how one could take on the different aspects of the personality at really anytime one wanted to, not just because of a need. As a firstborn I have all aspects of both parents in my personality and aspects of their parents and grandparents, parts I am not conscious of at this time.

So I think personality is like water, if you are healthy you flow from one aspect to another, like a good actor who can play many different people. and you improve what you can, weed the garden and rake up the leaves and all that. I think if one becomes fixed in a part of the personality this is when gender issues develop. I know in my past, I accessed the masculine aspects of my personality and acted out lots of different things that went on in my father’s life. I did the same thing with the feminine aspects and I did it all with a female body. I was never told I could not play with guns or dolls or that I had to wear dresses, by my parents. It was SOCIETY that dictated these rules. As it was I played more with boy toys than I did with girly things but this still did not make me want to alter my body to fit SOCIETIES IDEAS ABOUT WHAT A FEMALE PERSONALITY SHOULD BE. I did not feel the need to alter my body to suit one particular part of my personality. There are other issues which caused me to shift from one part of my personality to the other. I did wear dresses and date boys.

But this has nothing to do with how writers describe these situations between celebs. I don’t know if Chaz is a misogynist and if it is the case then all those years of therapy over this change would seem for naught and pointless if she turned he hates women and then hooks up with a man. Is he going to be a wife beater?

I will likely write more about this later.

There is a Carol King song, Fantasy Beginning and Fantasy Ending that I really related to in my 20’s, it opened my mind to the idea of different aspects of myself rather than something fixed which isn’t necessarily fantasy or phantasy as Klein would call it and a Streisand song, Everything, I also related to. I can do anything.

“Nicks” to exploit or really wanting to kill that success and possess it for themselves…?

2011-11-22T14:03:00.001-05:00

…why heros and idols must die symbolically. Cher’s managed to do this generations after her own by adapting to the next generation’s thinking and style. This is how a species survives – adaptation. I saw the movie too!

Lifting…

2011-11-22T03:07:00.001-05:00

Kay's Commentary

…dissociating and projecting. If you are lifted out of your present state by two people then it will collect all that they hear and see. I have been discovering this over the past few years since learning about what was happening at the Estes and Willow Drive intersections. I have been able to see what these people were seeing but only briefly. The other day I was waiting for the bus after grocery shopping which is located in a curve. When cars approach the curve it is easy for someone to get lifted if there are two people in the front seat of the car. I have often seen my own self standing at the stop after these cars pass by me. The other evening I was able to see the Staples sign around the corner and the bus stop going in the opposite direction while I was still standing at the bus stop. I usually try to catch them at the lights at the intersection. I even say the caution sign on the other side of Elliot. If I focused enough I probably could tell someone the phone numbers they dial on their phones or other personal info.

Still digesting what I have discovered here…revised

2011-11-20T16:02:00.001-05:00

Kay's Commentary: Neurolinguistic Programming, a case of helping or hurting…updated

…Last night I realized this film was produced during WWII when many men were engaged in fighting for our country, leaving their women at home alone and vulnerable. Stepford Wives is obviously the end result of the affects of Woman in Green, when soldiers came home to find their women obedient to their every command or sometimes having taken up with some other man through his influence upon her and her weakness as a result of that film. Then there are those women who took on the male role in the family, getting jobs for the war effort.

While the film may have attempted to show the viewers what was going on during some other time in history, there are probably as many, as is evident from my experience who were and may still be hypnotized or otherwise controlled by that film and others like it.

In viewing the film one might attempt to identify with the attractive femme fatale and one either has to choose to become like her or repress aspects of the character’s behavior which will likely be projected onto another female or in some cases possibly even a male causing him to feel feminine. As I mentioned one can also split off the feminine altogether becoming more masculine likely rejecting male suitors as one is conforming to the male nature of the personality of which one is now possessed.

A female viewing the film is taking in and processing the information presented in the film. If she splits off the feminine part portrayed in the film because she dislikes the character’s actions, she would then be possessed of the good half of her female personality. Unfortunately the good part has now become contaminated with the behaviors and dialogue of the seductress in the film. To rid oneself of the contaminated parts because it is uncomfortable or distressing, she might now have to repress the content of the mind from consciousness which might also be projected onto another, be it male or female, who might then act it out as in my case with the coats, Splitting and Projective Identification, James Grotstein. She would then become possessed of her animus which likely drove her to view the television and film in the first place, Man and His Symbols, Carl G. Jung, pg. 192, repeating the cycle of mental contamination with something new. Again reiterating what I wrote above, she would now likely reject any male advances or suitors as she is conforming to the male nature of the personality of which she is possessed. And the object or objects of her projection for whatever reason, are now controlled by the dialogue and whatever thoughts she might have had about the film including the hypnotic suggestion in the case of Woman in Green, until she rids her mind or it is cleared of that content by those who are possessed by the projection. If those subsequently possessed of the content are unable to discern the nature of the projection, they will be victims of it, again as evidenced in my purchasing numerous coats, which clues one in on the viewers basic thinking about the characters in that film.

There is an advantage to having this splitting and dissociating happen in the case of writers and film makers.

I told them the music was causing a problem…

2011-11-20T15:07:00.001-05:00

What's In Kay's Mind?: They are right, the music of the gay lesbian culture is quite different from the music of heterosexuals…

…I never heard that from anyone. I was never told anything of the kind about listening to music. What I have learned I learned from my own experience of its affect in the past 10 years, so no one is influencing me to say anything contrary to what the industry would want you to know. And when the mind is bombarded with so much information it is doubtful one could even hear or discern a mental message, probably the reason listening to music has been so prevalent in an attempt to mask that potential yet, creating its own affect on the human brain and mind. In this case face to face interaction is necessary.

The British; this seems to be the source of this comment, fail to recognize the United States Government, other than in matters of law and order, refrains from intervening in personal lives unless asked to for obvious reasons, some people don’t understand no and leave me alone. Generally the US Government stays out of the lives of its citizens, or at least they did until 911 gave them a reason to intrude. They have not failed in matters I requested to have addressed and did so in a most formidable manner, much better than I would have personally. If I thought they were a group of lawless human beings I certainly would have refrained from asking them for any help at all, I would have resorted to vigilantism. When Government is corrupt, then one does have a problem. A corrupt Government leads to vigilantism and the downfall of a society. They cannot legitimately govern if they are beleaguered with anxiety over matters which are criminal or illegal. A corrupt corporation faces the same kinds of problems and often gains control of another through rebellion against legitimate authority, so it seems. I have encountered those in society who choose to indulge in this kind of music or television because of abuse or a poor home life. I myself was often persuaded by rebellious lyrics which superseded anything of which my parents instructed me, giving power over my life to music and that industry, they became the parent and I never entertained intentions of becoming part of that industry. The music drew me into the thinking and ways of being of the authors of the lyrics. “I’m eighteen and I can do what I want”, “teachers leave those kids alone”. My life was forever altered but began to change again when I encountered higher levels of awareness in the so called “pop psychology” books to which I feel I owe a good deal of my current level of awareness, books I was told I shouldn’t be reading and caused my suicidal episodes. The academic courses I took, though limited seemed to tell me less than that which I learned from these books.

So, generally the US Government refrains from telling people they should do this or that or to stop listening to loud seductive and often harmful music the liberals have been known to use, as well as the television. It is a personal matter and one’s parents or the individual must draw their own conclusions about how one chooses to conduct one’s life. This is the nature of our freedoms in America. Where I see and know the inequities existed in our country and still do somewhat today are most importantly with the dissemination of knowledge and information about the health or harm of our indulgences and how they fit together in the scheme of things, from which corporations have gained profit due to the lack thereof, now being rectified with the personal home computer which gives its user more choices about what kinds of information they can spend their money on and choose to assimilate into their lives. This gives those who use the PC an advantage over things such as mind control, though of late the internet has been flooded with all sorts of advertisements. But there again, in mind control, it is the use of basic language, simple creative words used to direct my mind where industries of profit want it to go. This is the area in which I have the greatest conflict. Mind control as it now has evolved, in and of itself, in no way violates human rights since it is disseminated as written text distributed through books and the internet or orated via the radio or television in the form of memes and is somewhat protected by the freedom of expression clause in our Constitution. It is the intent of the content of the message which violates our basic human rights and less frequently the intentional use of distributed products to mask hidden messages which gain access to the human mind and injure the listener. Baggage Buster is one such product which masks its messages and refused to reveal the content of the script upon request, claiming it would not be affective if it were known. I have proven otherwise with my own programming intended to improve my daily life which hides nothing and in some the only thing hidden was a binaural beat which is detectable with careful listening.

So if truly communicated, your message was not received much to my chagrin.

I would argue this article was altogether accurate regarding brainwashing as Eric Fromm wrote clearly on some of the issues…

2011-11-19T20:37:00.001-05:00

Musical Hypnosis: Sound and Selfhood from Mesmerism to Brainwashing

…of idolatry and its use even by religion. In the case of this article one could be said to be mesmerized and even brainwashed by Jesus and his purported feats whether they be real or not. Even Moses was mesmerized by Aaron’s hypnotic suggestion that he could turn the staff belonging to Moses into a serpent. Again neurolinguistics grabs hold of the human brain. So it is with the music idol, political idols, fashion idols, film idols, writers, etc. Symbolism through art has its powers over the human brain as well.

Musical Hypnosis: Sound and Selfhood from Mesmerism to Brainwashing

2011-11-19T20:14:00.001-05:00

Musical Hypnosis: Sound and Selfhood from Mesmerism to Brainwashing

Everything we hear and read is neurolinguistics…

2011-11-19T14:17:00.001-05:00

NLP case in point…updated

2011-11-16T22:17:00.001-05:00

For example, in a study done by Yale psychologist John Bargh, participants holding warm as opposed to cold cups of coffee were more likely to judge a confederate as trustworthy after only a brief interaction. Similarly, at the University of Toronto, “subjects were asked to remember a time when they were either socially accepted or socially snubbed. Those with warm memories of acceptance judged the room to be 5 degrees warmer on the average than those who remembered being coldly snubbed. Another effect of Affection Is Warmth.” This means that we both physically and literary “warm up” to people.

The last few years have seen many complementary studies, all of which are grounded in primary experiences:
• Thinking about the future caused participants to lean slightly forward while thinking about the past caused participants to lean slightly backwards. Future is Ahead
• Squeezing a soft ball influenced subjects to perceive gender neutral faces as female while squeezing a hard ball influenced subjects to perceive gender neutral faces as male. Female is Soft
A Brief Guide to Embodied Cognition: Why You Are Not Your Brain | Guest Blog, Scientific American Blog Network

Above the author has described experiments regarding metaphor as affecting behavior. Is this really true?

In the first instance one reads a warm cup of coffee caused participants to get warm and fuzzy about confederates. If one applies Philosophy 101 to this statement it becomes clear this may or may not be true as there are variables which may cause one to choose differently. If I dropped a warm cup of coffee on my lap, then I am surely going to associate a warm cup of coffee likely with angry or unhappy feelings not warm fuzzies. Would my encounter with a confederate necessarily be unfavorable? This totally disregards the confederates ability to persuade the coffee drinker he is likeable. One can deduce that all participants who associated warm coffee with trustworthy confederates after a brief interaction had positive experiences with a warm cup of coffee prior to the experiment, still disregarding the confederates capacity to relate to the coffee drinker favorably. It is the statement itself that will create the neurological connection between a warm cup of coffee and a confederate as opposed to the actual experiment. This could be said to be hypnotic in that the reader may have been seduced by previous statements in the article. I think the real experiment would be whether a reader, sometime later, would have a cup of coffee and relate favorably to one who might claim to be a confederate.

What if I didn’t know anything about Philosophy 101?

As for priming, that is what is going on in the PBS episode of How The Brain Works, the narrator is primed to be blind to the true location of the ball, by the two magicians in their find the ball trick, why I think Tyson was unable to pick the right cup covering the ball. This is how they claim the brain can be tricked. Is this a fair assessment of perception?

Finally SCIAM and I agree on something and more to the point…updated

2011-11-16T13:51:00.001-05:00

Embodied cognition, the idea that the mind is not only connected to the body but that the body influences the mind, is one of the more counter-intuitive ideas in cognitive science. In sharp contrast is dualism, a theory of mind famously put forth by Rene Descartes in the 17^th century when he claimed that “there is a great difference between mind and body, inasmuch as body is by nature always divisible, and the mind is entirely indivisible… the mind or soul of man is entirely different from the body.” In the proceeding centuries, the notion of the disembodied mind flourished. From it, western thought developed two basic ideas: reason is disembodied because the mind is disembodied and reason is transcendent and universal. However, as George Lakoff and Rafeal Núñez explain:

A Brief Guide to Embodied Cognition: Why You Are Not Your Brain | Guest Blog, Scientific American Blog Network

…the body was God’s temple to be used as God saw fit or so we are told in the Bible, often inflicting abuses on the bodies of others for whatever reasons and to justify it, they call it work in the name of love and the future. It’s nothing more than a waste of life and intellect based on a lot of false dribble I’d like stripped from the human mind rather that my intelligence they seem to want to keep from me. I call it dumbing down in the name of economics. You can keep your economics and your ignorance. Money doesn’t buy honesty, trust or truth.

Of course I disagree the body can be divided and I am uncertain as to whether Descartes really wrote it. My limited resources and knowledge on Descartes’ work has not validated this fact. And most of us are aware or think the mind can be divided, by means of lifting or jacking up to describe it in a less academic fashion. What happens when you are jacked up where there is no mind? I think a dream I had says it all. I was in an elevator going to a job interview as a graphic artist and the elevator stopped on the 65th floor that had not been completed. I had to be lifted from the elevator by use of external means. What does this mean? I guess this means the person on the 65th floor died. Was it my mind that created the dream? Is this what happened to Eric Berne?

In the next sentence I will describe what these linguists call artificial intelligence. It is the assignment of the number 1 to the likeness of William-Gordon Cumming’s caricature on the Wikipedia, which lacks any human quality. The caricature of Cumming looking like the number 1 can be translated in computer science to the number 1, where 1’s and 0’s are used to write programs. Cumming’s caricature then becomes nothing more than numbers which create the digital replica of his caricature.

This is nothing like what Kay refers to as artificial intelligence, in which she defines the word artificial to mean unauthentic or fraudulent intelligence. This means I could speak the most eloquent of words in a speech or write them in an essay possessing the least amount of knowledge of the English language about a subject I know nothing about. I could also feel something about an object I have never seen. This is Kay’s definition of artificial intelligence or what one might also define as paranormal phenomenon. Both descriptions are the result of the creative use of the English language. These ideas are what Kay also understands as neurolinguistic programming. And, NLP seems to be based on the teachings of one called Abraham mentioned in the Bible but more in reference to accumulating wealth and the use of specific terminology that will cause another to hand over one’s hard earned dollars. One can, I suppose, accumulate other kinds of wealth, a wealth of ideas, words, sounds, images, etc. I also recollect finding verses in the Bible referencing NLP as, “God is the word and the word is with God”. I apologize that I have been unable to locate this verse again as I happened upon it without excogitation.

We all possess intelligence. Intelligence is the accumulation of all perceived by the human brain and body as mentioned above by the SCIAM author, some people have higher levels of academic intelligence than other people. Some people have higher levels of psychic intelligence than some others, which means they are often deprived of higher levels of academic intelligence in order to perform this feat, either by their own choosing or by decisions made for them, often without their permission. As we all know there are numerous fields of intelligence.

This means someone like a writer, was already connected to my mother who created the Twilight Zone Episode, Twenty-Two…

2011-11-14T20:39:00.001-05:00

Kay's Commentary: My findings on attention and awareness…revised

…then created the Nova Episode, Lost Empires II, The Roman Baths which explains why I was able to find this video online. I wouldn’t have known the aqueducts were there personally so whoever cleaned up Twenty-Two had some involvement in creating the Nova episode.

My findings on attention and awareness…revised

2011-11-13T15:59:00.001-05:00

Re: Twilight Zone, Twenty-Two and Sherlock Holmes, Woman in Green

As mentioned in a previous article, I viewed the Nova episode, Lost Empires II, The Roman Baths several years ago. In that film one’s attention is drawn to the aqueduct ruins. Several months later I viewed a Twilight Zone episode, Twenty-Two. I have no conscious recollection of ever having seen this episode of Twilight Zone, although I have seen others and I clearly recall the ones I have seen.

The main character in Twenty-Two looked like my mother. She probably would have been in her early twenties when seeing these films. During the viewing of this film my attention was drawn to a painting on the wall behind the Doctor and Nurse, that of aqueducts. I turned my attention to how this might have happened. It was evident my mother viewed this program in my youth and probably this episode and because we are psychically connected it would be the content of her mind which caused me to chose this episode of Twilight Zone and how I found the aqueducts, what Jung termed synchronicity. This means my mother did likely see the painting and it was imprinted on her brain but she never actually focused on it. I am certain she was likely more focused on the action between the Doctor, patient, nurse and the star’s manager in the film, but may have been unconsciously curious about the painting. The painting was part of the items in the film she repressed but were certainly more active in her mind as opposed to the action between the Doctor and patient, resolved by the end of the film. Details about the aqueducts had not been resolved until I viewed Lost Empires II, The Roman Baths, so it seems I have been on an unconscious quest to uncover information about the aqueducts most of my life. My father was claimed to have had a split personality but it is clear it was both of them.

I think it is clear what we are focused upon and give attention to has the least amount of power over our minds and behavior. It is all we slightly are aware of, such as mall music, or give attention to, often with no resolution, which has the most power over our minds and behavior.

In the previous paper I also mentioned having viewed the film Sherlock Holmes, Woman in Green. This is another film my mother viewed probably during her pregnancies which, due to the content of her mind and synchronicity being what it is, I selected out of a plethora of films to view on the internet, the beauty of the computer. I can navigate through my mind and find much of what is contained there in as opposed to viewing the television whose producers and advertisers show me what they want me to see rather than what I might choose to see.

In the article I mentioned I was influenced in choosing a coat, first a green one, then a black one and finally a tan one. I described the scene in which Holmes and Watson visit a group supposedly involved in the study of hypnosis, hoping to find clues to the attempted assassination of Holmes. A subject is seated on stage and is placed under hypnosis, at which time a large long needle is pierced through his hand to which the subject has no response. Then, Watson claiming resistance to the practice, is placed under a hypnotic spell, via the use of a wheel resembling a huge lollipop. He is directed to remove one of his shoes, his sock and role up the leg of his pants as if he were about to cross a small brook. Then he is awakened.

My mother’s pregnancies took place from 1954-1961. Again acting out what she had seen on the television; in 1963 while playing outside, in shorts no socks or shoes, I crossed a small brook between our yard and the vacant lot next to our house which led to a large creek where we played and where there were lots of blackberry bushes. Upon crossing the brook I stepped on a nail in a board with my left foot. Pain shot through my little foot and I flung myself down on the ground with the board hanging from my foot, finally pulling it out. Blood was pouring from my foot as I hobbled back to the house so my mother could bandage it. I eventually had to have a tetanus shot that hurt as much as getting the nail in my foot. Of course I was admonished for failure to pay attention and for not wearing shoes, a nice pair of sneakers that were in my closet.

I have only today become aware of this event as it relates to the Woman in Green film, it was the jumbled up processing of that film by the brains of one or both of my parents which brought about the event, not anything I failed to think or do at the age of 9 years old. This is the mind/body connection. Had I been made aware of pain and possibly death from the needle piercing the hand I may have been more alert to avoiding such incidents and would have avoided the nail in the board in the brook, probably jumping over it rather than stepping on it.

For obvious reasons I urge viewers to take special care with regard to their television viewing.

Kitty was one of the main characters in the film Tipping The Velvet, Sarah Waters…

2011-11-12T20:42:00.001-05:00

Police Seek ID of Body Found in Storage Unit - The Missourian: Emissourian

…which I have seen since prison and parts of Millbank Prison I had acted out in connection with an incarceration in the NCCIW prison in 1990-91. I was picked up off my feet by the Sheriff and shoved into the back of the State vehicle and taken to prison. During most of my incarceration I was screaming and yelling. At my release I was given a bag of pills and bus ticket. I got a car and was homeless for nearly 7 years. During that seven years I rented four storage units where I put my property. In the Wilmington, NC unit I put a huge metal desk, boxes of personal papers, things for an apartment, laundry detergent, a bicycle and rack (both stolen when my car was stolen in 1996) and then later moved in a love seat I purchased. In the others were mostly boxes of books and clothes and other personal items.

I suspect the writer who purchased the sofa was attempting to get the love seat for a lot cheaper than what I paid and I got it on sale, thinking I would end up dead somewhere before I could get it out, and it was purchased by a Wilmington resident as told to me by the sales person who sold me the love seat. I made this purchase in 1995 and was arrested and sent to prison in November of 1996 for 4 months where I was subjected to the extremely loud noise from the cement factory less than 500 yards from the prison intake office and only a little farther from the dorms. “She’ll be brain dead when I get through with her”.

Refusing me necessary medications – What’s In Kay’s Mind

Apparently this video is a ploy to avert any wrong doing by those involved.

This is clearly implanting ideas via NLP into the minds of readers, supporters and

2011-11-12T19:45:00.001-05:00

Elizabeth Loftus - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

…and believers of Wikipedia whether this information is fact or fiction. Once the human brain has ingested this information it will act on and behave as if this information were in fact true.

This is not the case in most repressed memories as I am living proof of it and it is more likely children are acting out something, which in no way infers that their later memories of those events are false and acting out or not, my physical body was violated orally and anally by young men seeking to perpetrate this act upon someone, a small child, as I was at the time, being an easy target. It certainly is not a figment of my imagination. Whether either of them read the book Story of O is yet to be determined which in my opinion would have influenced their behavior toward me as an easy target rather than a woman their age or older who would have likely refused such advances. I suspect my mother was the initial target of these sexual fantasies and as mentioned I later became the object on which they acted them out.

These industries are always talking about their rights and freedoms when it comes to publishing but what about the rights of innocent children to be protected from such smut that only serves to make young children and woman a target.

IT IS PAST TIME WE TOOK ACTION TO STOP IT.

Since rereading this article I connected the film Twenty- Two with Woman in Green…

2011-11-12T19:03:00.001-05:00

Kay's Commentary: Neurolinguistic Programming, a case of helping or hurting…updated

It seems likely a viewer who I determined to be my mother, had become hypnotized by that film or was subjected to projections from another and was acting it out. I clearly recollect a time when my father stepped his foot onto a chair and rolled up his pant leg, actually he rolled up both of them when there was no need. It seems the part of the dialogue in which the hypnotist stated there was no need for Watson to role up his other pant leg became something else or as a game they changed it to both pant legs. There was a John Watson and Nell Watson living in Hyde County where both my parents grew up and lived most of their lives.

Neurolinguistic Programming, a case of helping or hurting…updated

2011-10-30T04:17:00.001-04:00

Thanks for taking the time to read this article. I hope the reader will gain invaluable insights from my experiences during the past 10 years of my work in pursuit of mental health. I am happy to share some of these experiences with the reader. I do ask that the reader respect my work as I reserve rights to the use of this work. Any usage in publications for profit, monetary or otherwise (this includes college reports and essays) must be requested in writing.

For the past 10 years I have been working on my personal mental health after having been diagnosed with mental illness. I was quite angered by the diagnoses I had received never believing I had any real defects of mind or brain function. I set out to work on and discover the truth. At one point in the work, I was troubled by what I thought was the haphazard use of a self-hypnosis tape. It supposedly aided in the techniques of self hypnosis and I worried it rather hypnotized me and left me vulnerable to any unscrupulous input I might happen to have encountered since its use. I soon discovered it was the least of my problems. As time went on in my pursuits I searched for and purchased CDs and tapes claiming to help one in meditation, sleep, success or some health promoting achievement. Some did as claimed while others only seemed to cheat one of time and money and one CD had me handing over my loose change to every merchant nearby. One triggered me to compile a list of songs and lyrics I recollected. I was immensely saddened to discover the effect music lyrics had on my brain, mind and behavior. I connected behaviors I acted out to specific lyrics I heard and had resolved, within myself at that time, I was completely insane. There were only a few songs which had the most impact on my inability to discipline my listening time and another song set me up for a suicidal attempt in 1988.

Distraught at my behaving poorly, somewhat robotic like and having been incarcerated and institutionalized on numerous occasions, I had been unaware of the causes of many of my actions which led to these incarcerations and institutionalizations prior to this period of mental work. Unable to break the hold television and films had over my life, I continued to watch TV but less frequently as I progressed. I viewed the film Artificial Intelligence, which gave me a little insight into my difficulties but attempted to blame the robotic character’s human parents for his demise which fed my seemingly insatiable curiosity and sent me on a mind bender about my parents and my childhood. I was initially led to believe my problems were rooted in a developmental disability I have since discovered was more likely influenced by history or external sources rather than anything willfully chosen by my parents. My lack of knowledge made it difficult to ascertain this for sure. Nonetheless, the film evoked curiosity as I pursued the work before me. Continuing to improve my awareness, I grew more interested in my brain and rekindled my high school interest in psychology. I started reading various books on psychology and psychoanalysis from the local University. Choosing to fulfill my deceased father’s wishes that we read educational material, I often opted to watch documentaries and things such as the History Channel. One day, after several years into my work, I discovered Hulu on the internet. It is comprised of a large selection of films, documentaries and TV episodes. Perusing the collection, I opted to watch Nova: Secrets of The Lost Empires II, The Roman Baths I viewed in its entirety. On another occasion, I chose to see, The Brain That Wouldn’t Die. The title seemed familiar to me. I later blogged about this film discovering I had posted it at nearly the exact time shown on the clock in the film, 5:00 pm, although I had not changed the time zone on my blog. I attributed this first to synchronicity, then to having used the Baggage Buster CD which is suppose to help one rid oneself of self defeating thoughts and transferences. I recently remembered a high school friend studying art had recreated the laboratory set up in the film as an art form while in college so I am thinking now I did see this film but had no recollection of it. It was becoming clearer films I had seen had a profound affect on my brain and mind. I then decided to create a list of most of the films and television episodes I had seen. I was surprised at how many films I could actually recall but my distress was eased by a lack of any detailed memories of the content of the films. Unfortunately, what I had not yet learned was the possibility I was the victim of projections and/or projective identification some of the time, rather than having any true desire to constantly bombard myself with TV and music which then programmed my mind to do what it wanted me to do as opposed to what I wanted to do. This is the nature of mind viruses and memes mentioned in Richard Brody’s book Virus of the Mind, unfortunately he ignores those programmed into the brain by long term repetitive listening and viewing as well. Synapses wired together fire together.

Hulu eventually added Twilight Zone I viewed frequently in my youth and episode Twenty-Two is one I chose to watch. After viewing this film a second time, paying closer attention, I discovered a painting on the wall behind the Doctor who was attempting to calm his distraught patient. I realized he was hypnotizing the patient and maybe even me the viewer. I soon made connections with the painting in the film to the aqueducts in the Nova episode of Secrets of the Lost Empires II. While continuing to recall more of my history, the late fall of that year I purchased a sage green coat from Wal-Mart. I grew to dislike it and purchased a black one of the same style. Deciding I did not like the black one, I purchased a tan coat of a different style, more like a short waisted Holmes London Fog which I eventually gave to my sister, as I was no longer able to wear it. I continued the self help work, communicating with the local mental health facility periodically. I searched through the Hulu collection again one evening and chose to watch The Woman in Green as they had added several Sherlock Holmes episodes. I was somewhat knowledgeable about hypnosis and by this time had read about Charcot. I also educated myself on neurolinguistic programming through books dealing with the subject specifically and through Tony Robbins’ work in his 1986 book Unlimited Power I purchased in 1988. I had also read The Power of The Subconscious Mind by Joseph Murphy in the 1980’s along with many other works on human psychology.

In viewing the Woman in Green, I discovered a segment of the film in which Sherlock Holmes decided a hit man had been hypnotized and proceeded to seek out the source. He located a group who were entertaining people with stage hypnosis and proceeded to investigate. During the investigation Dr. Watson became a subject, denying he could be hypnotized at all. He was then hypnotized and induced to engage in certain behaviors during the hypnotic trance. Of course the viewer would tend to think it was all made up by film makers, possibly becoming hypnotized themselves, as the rest of the characters in the film including those in the audience did not appear to be bothered by the hypnotic induction. I think this is due to film making techniques such as split screen, etc. It was during this part of the film I discovered the hypnotic wheel. It reminded me of the image used to depict the wormhole like tunnel in the Time Tunnel series as it stood out in my mind when I viewed it in my youth and reminded me of the lollipops in The Wizard of Oz.

Through the process of learning about NLP, I was able to relate hypnosis to neurolinguistic programming, as, via the astute use of words and some hypnotic gestures in hypnosis another could control or manipulate one’s behavior. This is basically the concepts described in NLP only hypnosis is not employed as a means of control. And I have discovered hypnotic suggestions might not manifest immediately as demonstrated in the film but eventually could if not countered with other dialogue. Around this time I purchased the film Dreamcatcher based on a Stephen King novel I had not read. In this film one will discover one of the characters employs a circular motion with his finger similar to that used by the devices in Time Tunnel and Woman in Green. In Dreamcatcher, Dudditz uses this gesture and transfers it to one of the members of the group of boys in the film, to use for the good of the world. It is clear the lollipop in The Wizard of Oz had evolved and had changed colors from black and white to red and white, to blue and black and was even invisible, in these subsequent films. Working through the possibility I might have seen Woman in Green in the past, I had ideas I could have been hypnotized by it. I had no real memory of having seen it and it was possible my mother had viewed it and I was acting out her thoughts about what she had seen, although she knows nothing of hypnosis. I failed to relate the hypnotic device to anything else I had seen immediately as I had been taking various sedatives and inhibitory amino acids because of sleeplessness due to things I had heard or what others had been hearing from music and films. I had also connected Stepford Wives and Robocop to my robotic like behaviors, both films I had viewed prior to Woman in Green. Once I stopped taking the sedatives and amino acids, I was able to remember more things I had seen on television. This is when I started relating The Wizard of Oz, Time Tunnel, Woman in Green, Stepford Wives, Robocop, Dreamcatcher and even Girl Interrupted all to each other.

So, since becoming aware of the film Woman in Green, made in 1939, I became conscious of was happening to me and why I purchased the green coat, only to later go back and purchase a black and tan one. I decidedly did not like the woman in green because she was an evil character and I had no desire to emulate her in my life, and there is no question my actions were being manipulated by the film rather than any conscious choice of my own with regards to purchasing the coats. During this time I found a copy of the book, Age of Manipulation, the Con in Confidence and the Sin in Sincere, that delves into ideas of mind control via television and advertising, from which I concluded they were also altering human sexual activity probably in some cases invoking homosexuality. This is in addition to behavior which I have come to understand, has been influenced by history. I fully understood I was being manipulated by the writer’s ideas as well.

In the previous paragraph I claimed I purchased these coats because I did not want to identify with the Woman In Green as she was a seductress and connected with an evil person. It is possible I was acting out the memories of someone I am psychically connected to like my mother, who might have seen this film, and needing a coat chose these rather than something else. It is possible I was also acting out the projections of someone who was interested in buying a coat and the mystery person, possibly having seen this film, might have projected the idea of a green coat and the frightening scenes away from themselves, of which I became the object and proceeded to act out the scenes in the film to the point of even wanting to climb over the edge of a parking deck. Having so many different psychic connections since 1972, it is probably impossible to pinpoint who watched this film. It is certainly clear I was neither projecting nor dissociating and was likely a victim of projective identification, being homeless myself at the time of the incident and this event fitting in with the dialogue in that scene from which Holmes recovered to save himself and capture the criminal.

Having no recollection of this film or never having seen this film at all, before buying the coats, is certainly evidence I was possibly acting under the influence of someone else’s thoughts and doing it quite unconsciously. If I had seen this film and recollected it, surely I would have made different choices. All of the bad guys in this film were dressed in black coats, including the hypnotist and his subject. Even Watson wore black while being hypnotized (represents him as a negative believer), why I or the person thinking the thoughts, chose not to wear the black coat and purchased a beige or tan coat of a different style, which would most resemble Holmes’ coat in color. I also possessed a coat of a tan color in my youth, a London Fog, which made me feel like a detective and which I frequently acted out in play with friends. In 1987-88 I began my own research into hypnosis trying various self hypnosis tapes and even using a hypnosis tape to stop smoking cigarettes, so this problem has been going on for nearly 2 decades. I eventually gave the new tan coat to my sister as I could no longer wear it.

Not only did I buy these coats but in 1995 I almost climbed off the parking deck in Durham, NC in front of the Veteran’s Hospital. Had I not heard someone say to me, “don’t do it”, my life might have ended that night. I thought I was mixed up with some homeless person or some disabled veteran and only recently have I connected this film to the incident. Having ditched the green and black coats and opting for the tan one, also demonstrates how I connected with Holmes which aided me in solving my own dilemma and finding this film as the root of the problem.

The coats I purchased in 2004.

It has become clear devices including sex, seduction, color and other tricks of the trade, used in Woman in Green, Time Tunnel, Dreamcatcher, Girl Interrupted, and many other films, all anchored dialogue, behavior and ideas in my brain, while the use of hypnotic words repressed consciousness of what was truly happening to me. Subsequently the industry would then be able to manipulate the viewer into watching whatever they wanted them to, setting writers up for their next project using the brains and minds of those who indulged in viewing television programs and films. Anchoring is part of the effectiveness of NLP and you will find a description of its use in many of the books on the subject. There have been claims the basis of this way of thinking regarding the use of films purported to improve human behavior and psychological development as research has always been conducted in this area of study relating to the advancement of society and its social issues, of which innocent unknowing viewers of these films have become victims, without clear knowledge or consent. This was dramatized in an episode of Tales of Tomorrow titled, The Evil Within, I now question as nothing more than a psychological projection. It seems there is more evil outside us which gets projected toward us, rather than any innate evil within us, as is dramatized in Dreamcatcher, in which I in no way insinuate there is one species more evil than another, as I believe evil is created from what we perceive as dangerous to us personally without seeing the whole picture. Unfortunately the author of The Evil Within drops the ball opting for television as a cure. The sad truth is I now know I could have achieved a far superior level of mental health in a shorter period of time had I stopped viewing the television in my youth and sought out the aid of a trained professional psychologist or psychotherapist in dealing with the personal issues that plagued my family. No film has ever truly corrected any specific personal difficulty without side effects and actually promoted the breakdown of my family and as a result my father took his own life. And in short, the film industry is not designed to nor promotes itself as anything more than a group of people entertaining its viewers, while the undisciplined objects of their entertainment become victims of mental illness. It often forces them into employment in the industry which rendered them mental dependents of which they may have no desire to be a part, otherwise costing the government millions of dollars supporting those unable to maintain gainful employment in other industries as a result of the self inflicted mental impairment.

Recently, while still engaging in my pursuits, I discovered another old film titled The Woman Who Came Back and The Strangler in the Swamp. In Strangler in the Swamp a group of characters convince an old man to sacrifice himself for the good of the rest of the town. Having a keener knowledge of NLP by this time, it was clear the dialogue was dangerous and most likely affected the behaviors of many people who viewed it, my mother and father possibly among (more likely victims of another viewer) them as well as the townspeople with whom I grew up and likely unconsciously affected their behavior toward me and others in my age group as well as many in the nation as a whole. I am sure it is why numerous people flocked to Hollywood sacrificing otherwise simpler lives to the business of entertaining. And even more so I am sure it is why so many people have become victims of books, films and music which impaired otherwise normal healthy thinking. I was surprised and upset to read this same argument was held between Edgar Alan Poe and his publisher in the 1800’s regarding the subject of his work and its affect on his readers despite the fact I have never been an avid reader of fictional material of any kind though I did indulge in it in my youth. Did it not occur to them later these films would do the same thing?

Was mental impairment merely a side effect of reading books and were there hopes the television would resolve these issues with book readers or was it simply part of the primary goal? With knowledge that had already been uncovered about hypnotism and its mechanics and the use of violent film clips to oppress any insurrection by the masses who might legitimately and rightfully protest constitutional violations and political and economic oppression, I would be more inclined to say it was the latter which became the case, a deliberate attempt to control the population at large and is the basis for the state of our eventual economic down turn in 2008 in which billions of dollars have been stolen and were stolen on Wall Street. Blinded by the light, the light within the television that is.

Having utilized the CD titled Baggage Buster, I have been able to root out dialogue clearly designed to control spending behaviors as well as inducing one to relinquish knowledge and ideas to others who profit from those ideas, “you must give it to us”, but only at the high cost of my brain’s synaptic activity. I have discovered this to be true for myself personally and for those to whom I am connected. I have also discovered dialogue attempting to induce me to take my own life, fortunately after I had reprogrammed myself with dialogue to counter these possibilities and after numerous periods of catharsis. Was I reprogramming myself? On many occasions I have been confused by conflicting thoughts about myself thinking I was being accused of criminal behavior as opposed to being a good and descent citizen, as I did frequently view programs such as the Sherlock Holmes films I mentioned. In these instances it is clear I was the victim of a dissociation from the “good guy” thinking, most likely by writers in denial of their own intent. A psychiatric evaluation done in the 1990’s by the Veteran’s administration concluded I was suffering from multiple personality disorder at the time of that evaluation and information I retrieved from the library at that facility clearly stated writers were aware of this problem among traumatized persons, most likely viewers of violent television. I also concluded I was beyond doubt developmentally delayed as the result of my parents viewing the television when I was a child and later by my self as I acquired the habits and impulses from my parents own viewing I was unable to control and still have problems controlling at this time. In many cases it is the result of subliminal messaging carefully worded in the programs.

Some of the music I have listened to such as Train of Thought, Staying Alive and others have been somewhat helpful in maintaining awareness and obstructing dangerous destructive thoughts from taking hold of my mind. And, most recently I have listened to Virus of the Mind by Richard Brody, also extremely helpful in uncovering destructive memes used to control the mind and brain.

This article is simply intended to express my findings and thoughts about my experiences which hopefully enlightens the reader. The reader is unquestionably free to choose to acknowledge or deny my truth and make his or her own decisions about the helpfulness, harmfulness or undoubtedly the existence of a little of both in films, television and music.

America One Trillion dollars in debt?

2011-10-13T13:54:00.001-04:00

Where is the money? I don’t see any jobs, I don’t see any improvements in infrastructure. From the looks of a good bit of Massachusetts it isn’t there in their cities outside Boston. It certainly isn’t in my home town. Yet you want to keep reaching into our pockets, our hearts and our minds for money. I don’t see any major improvements in a lot of other communities either, some nothing more than ghost towns, nearly abandoned. People leaving for the big city, as in the Wizard of Oz – seduced – running for jobs under the corporate umbrella like in Tom Hank’s film, little men, in their little brown suits, their little brown felt hats and their brown leather shoes walking into their little buildings and their little offices, just like the people building pyramids in Egypt, which victimizes their lives in the end. We do have some expensive national monuments like the Great Sphinx, scattered about America in one place or another. How nice, maybe I can get a job polishing them up one day or maybe I can break off the arm of the Statue of Liberty and eat it for lunch or drop it across the river to replace the bridge washed away by the hurricane. What a joke. Bridges are falling, floods are destroying and earthquakes are shaking down some of our communities and California seems the quickest to recover from such disasters. Many are still getting those big fat paychecks while the rest of the world crumbles under their noses.

I remember a time when the little town of Engelhard, where my mother and father grew up, was booming with lots of jobs and things to do. Those people who owned those businesses took our money and left for “bigger” and “better” places. Many of them went to California. Now our town has little to no commerce, no jobs, buildings crumbling and no money to support us. We have to beg and borrow from the State and Federal Government, then our children are enslaved to cleaning up someone else’s dirty laundry, what corporations don’t want to do once they acquire a pocket full of OUR money for something we don’t even need and won’t last more than a year so we have to buy another one. They are taking our money and leaving the country for expensive resorts and little islands all over the world, while we struggle for jobs to keep our homes. It’s passed time we wake up America. 2008 should never happen again.

Psychotomimetic drugs…

2011-09-12T14:43:00.001-04:00

My experience of these types of drugs is quite different from this description of psychotomimetic on the wiki. The psychosis is already there, the drugs simply permit the visions and voices to become visible and audible, if they are outside the self. I have experienced this even while taking Abilify. Voices that are derived from within the brain can be controlled with some medications. I can shut down voices from within with taurine, it does not control those from outside the brain even when no one is talking to you. Even taking 2000 grams of Taurine I am sometimes able to here voices. Risperidone enhanced the voices when I took it as well. Seroquel knocks me out, even at 7.5 mgs, so I don’t know if I am still hearing voices or not. My experience with PCP and LSD made me aware of the existence of thoughts and images outside the brain. They did not get there by taking the PCP or LSD, they were already there.

So I again find cause to disagree with the wiki or the psychiatric community altogether. These drugs do not create the mind or what is in the mind. I create what is in my mind or it is transferred there by some other source. You have little control over what is put into your mind externally, such as music at the grocery store unless you want to starve, or such as when I took the LSD and saw clearly sleep passing before my eyes like a ticker tape and being impotent to stop it. It is hard to say if the the word “sleep” was the result of some subliminal message on the television or the result of one of Sherlock Holmes’ films in which Doctor Watson was hypnotized, The Lady In Green.

Signs of greenhouse gases or just drought…

2011-08-22T20:42:00.001-04:00

…are greenhouse gases affecting insects already? For the first time in many years since stopping smoking and regaining my lung capacity, I noticed I was having difficulty breathing while walking up the stairs to my apartment. I have not had this kind of a problem for 11 years. I wondered if it were from increased CO2.

S$P Downgrades…

2011-08-15T15:48:00.001-04:00

As they said, they had no choice. Raising the National Debt is only going to make things worse for us in the long run. And Iike I mentioned before, there are only a few million people who are not in debt in this country and they hold most of the money and prevent new jobs or create them. In the end they will keep stockpiling most of the money because they have it while the rest of us become slaves to their whims. You can’t keep buying if you don’t have the jobs or the salaries to spend.

Where are they going to go when people start starving and the riots break out all over this country because the jobs have dried up?

Capitalism has not served us well and the history of it speaks for it self. This delay in funding new jobs, it’s to break us to their will, make us beg. I guess the middle class can takeover the roles of the poor in this country when they kill us all off. I’m sure they’ll love that.

The Secret Laws of Buyology…

2011-08-11T15:04:00.001-04:00

New issue of iD! Now on newsstands everywhere. - iD - Ideas & Discoveries#more

Blaming my brain? Do you think advertisers are going to throw away $500 billion dollars in advertising money? Hardly. A buy button? This idea is created by slick advertising. The Psychology of Selling, CIA Manipulation Manual, Bend anyone to your will in seconds, How To Win Friends and Influence People, are all about how to control people and get my dollar. The airways are filled with memes to get me to spend my money and if I fall into debt or poverty they will hardly want to bail me out. Only after I have suffered some serious illness due to that poverty or I become mentally ill because of the tools used to get my money will they help me up. Shame on you for trying to turn my beautifully perceptive brain into its own enemy. What I put into my brain is what I get. We are tricked by this $600 billion business of advertising to believe our brains are deceiving us so we believe the television and advertising rather than what our brains and minds are telling us. We lose ourselves and give control to the television and advertising. Lack of sufficient knowledge also contributes. We tend to believe what others tell us if we lack sufficient knowledge about our brains and bodies. I have been a victim of this lack of sufficient knowledge.

It was interesting to read this article only to discover the shrewd tactics employed to get the reader to buy a pack of cigarettes, employing a well known biological fact and associating it with the brain’s so called addiction center [does it truly exist?] where this biological habit probably originates [the act of sucking designed for mother’s breast and our survival] and why we eat to live.

Nicotine is inhibitory in the brain and shuts off frontal lobe activity, the area of the brain that polices our behaviors. Why nicotinic acid and nicotine patches are sometimes employed to help people stop smoking, which only replaces the nicotine from cigarettes. This is also how many SSRIs (serotonin reuptake inhibitors) work by inhibiting frontal lobe activity. When synapses in the frontal region are turned off, the mind takes over and whatever we’ve put into our brain and mind will rule the day. If one has been an avid viewer of the television, then that advertising is going to take control of my behavior. If I am smoking, this is why I have a problem stopping, the messages are not reaching the frontal region of my brain that would help me quit. There is no trickery here. It is a simple matter of neurochemistry at work. Niacin, nicotinic acid and nicotinamide are B vitamins that also utilize the same receptors in the brain as the nicotine from tobacco, but in far smaller amounts. Nictotine from tobacco is quick acting because it gets into the system under the tongue and reaches the frontal lobes quickly like many other sublingual products such as melatonin which is also neuro-inhibitory. And interestingly enough, your amazingly intelligent body makes its own niacin from tryptophan in the gut.

The “gotta have it” program in our brains? Programmed by whom? Advertising. Do I really have to have it? Did I really need this magazine? Apparently not. My brain certainly does not create these ideas without help and even pushing the on button on the television is programmed into the brain, probably by my parents and they were programmed by the television and advertisers. It’s a manufactured collusion between me, the television and advertisers in which I am tricked into giving consent for my brain to be used to spread an idea. Having played the game of dominos, I understand how a single idea can affect a multitude of people. Tip one domino and it triggers a cascade of dominos tumbling, if they are set up correctly, and this is the key, setting one up correctly. This is how advertising works. One person tells his buddy or girlfriend and the message gets spread far and wide. This is how my brain works, trigger one memory and a cascade of memories will follow.

The rest of your article was on target. My own experiences with music in malls are that they attempt to use music which creates a love relationship between the customer and the store or the products they sell. Love chocolate? You will eat more of it. Take it or leave it, you will probably leave it. I have been exploited this way because I have never been breast fed and I am an easy target for this kind of research. It is also why I was addicted to cigarettes for 15 years and both my parents smoked. I clearly recall the Marlboro Man, Salem and Newport [like a cool breath of fresh air with snow capped mountains in the background] advertisements still today. After 10 years of smoking I could hardly run around the block without being out of breath and I suffered with chronic bronchitis from 1980 until several years after I quit.

Decades of advertising have flooded our brains and minds and corporations know this and exploit it to get our dollars. It’s fine if you want to spend and you have the money to spend but many get caught up in the mental menagerie of advertising ideas and wind up deep in debt with no way out. Knowledge is power.

This video clearly demonstrates how the brain is manipulated by imagery:

I can stop these tactics.

Now Obama, what do you say to the Medical Profession who expects…

2011-08-09T14:42:00.001-04:00

What's Been in Kay's Brain? What's In Her Mind?: You think I am delusional? updated…

jobs??????????????????????

Projection and Projective Identification…

2011-08-03T13:41:00.001-04:00

Projection (also projective identification)
Projection, also called projective identification, involves the tendency to see your own unacceptable desires in other people. In other words, the desires are still there, but they're not your desires anymore.

The objective is to make yourself feel superior.

Definitions in psychology: narcissism, splitting, paranoia etc.

Most people project to keep from feeling inferior, not that they are inferior, but they are made to feel inferior by a projection and this was probably derived from another projection that came from a projection, ad infinitum. Generally I think bad feelings are put into someone, then they have to project to discover what is really going on and generally I think most people withdraw their projections when they learn the roots of their inferior feelings whether it be from themselves or if someone made them feel this way and they forgot about it. One who is the object of a projection may react to this projection as if it were directed at them personally because they have low self esteem or a weak ego themselves or are simply unsure if the projection is true for them. If they succumb to the projection it is then projective identification. A confident person can handle projections. One who has succumb to projections (projective identification and acting out) may, after learning they have been the victim of projections, react in a more sensitive manner than those who have stronger egos. Know thyself, very wise words. Projection and projective identification are not the same and should not be construed to be the same, though they are related.

One can project feelings of superiority onto others who might not be superior. This again is because the projector thinks or has been made to feel superior and believes him or her self to be inferior (projective identification). Comparing ourselves to others and where we are in life is unfair to ourselves as well as others. It is simply a fact of life that some have greater advantages than others. What we do with what we have makes the difference in who we are and how we feel about ourselves.

Hollywood is often the object of many projections, good and bad and many of them put themselves out there as objects because they are confident in who they are and can handle the projections, although most often there is no real physical putting in of anything, they are putting them out. They (the characters they portray) are simply the objects to which the thoughts are directed. Sometimes this gets shifted onto one in the family or circle of friends. The same goes for parents and their children and personal relationships are often the scene of projections. A good example of this would be if a parent were always telling a female child, you are just like your father. A developing or weak ego might take this in as a directive to become like the father. The brain, whose only job is to process information, is going to go on a hunt and seek for patterns of behavior that evoke actions like those of the father. The feminine parts get repressed and could eventually become lost to the female child. The female child then, might well appear to be masculine. Does this acting out eradicate or re-enforce masculine behavior? It’s like a fat person and a skinny person looking at each other, the fat person will start to look skinny and think skinny thoughts while the skinny person will start to think fat thoughts and get fatter. How I taught my brother to play sports, by watching sports, although the real training would come from learning the game itself. Despite my efforts I think this contributed to my brother’s dyslexia. This is often how we are manipulated in advertising as well. In order to defend one's self, one must be armed with the same knowledge.

The online description and my description are two completely different approaches to an understanding of the term projection and projective identification, the latter which I found in error. One cannot deny that there are others who wish to feel superior to others, but for whatever reason they are prevented from being who they really want to be. This is artificial intelligence. Measuring one’s true superiority over another is certainly more than a simple projection that may or may not make one superior. One of superior intelligence will highly unlikely project or succumb to a projection and will likely know that this is going on. One who is trained as a psychoanalyst or psychotherapist would have superior skills at handling a projection as opposed to a casual friend. Projecting can become splitting or dissociation in which case one could be separated from one’s intelligence or some talent. The one who possesses the split off or dissociated part will appear intelligent but may not be at all. Shirley McClain called this channeling. Jane Roberts did it in her Seth books. This does not mean that McClain or Roberts lacked intelligence. If they had been children then we might say they had artificial intelligence. Dr. Restak mentions this in his lecture on Optimizing the Brain. He talks about automatic processing that goes on without conscious thought, though one would tend to think of channeling as coming directly from the mind of another.

Using projection to make one’s self feel superior? It may be that one is again trying to keep the inferior feelings of another at bay which makes it appear one is trying to be superior and this often occurs during ego development which can be an ongoing process as in my case (and most of us) where history, traumas and the nature of our society often inhibit normal development. Having an ego does not make one superior over another. Accusing someone of thinking they are superior is a projection covering up the projectors feelings of inferiority, so as I see it, the online description is somewhat of a projection.

While knowing thyself is important, it does not magically make our problems go away. Sometimes we are plagued by the history and habits of others as we blindly navigate our way through our daily lives occasionally getting into trouble. In this case one can seek help.

How did I come to these conclusions? I viewed this free lecture on Optimizing the Brain from the Teaching Company yesterday. I am also familiar with William Gibson’s Pattern Recognition, although I have read none of his books, the title clued me in, in a rather shallow way at first, about recognizing patterns of behavior. I had also read a bit about it from a book on Alcoholism, can’t recall the title. These books all hint at the crux of our problems in society as a whole. And recently I have been learning about how my brain works, so my thoughts are a compilation of things I am learning.

There is no Autism gene…

2011-07-30T22:49:00.001-04:00

I think Ahmadinejad’s afraid of what happened…

2011-07-17T20:12:00.001-04:00

Ahmadinejad's Message For Bush - 60 Minutes - CBS News

…when the white man came into North America and was accused of wiping out most of the Native population. I have not been able to get this interview off my mind so I am writing about it.

Ahmadinejad mentions nothing about September 11, 2001 and the murdering of 3000 American citizens who occupied our World Trade Centers, as the reason the US is occupying Iraq and Afghanistan which has nothing to do with Bush’s or the Republican’s capacity to improve our economy, although billions of dollars went into funding the war against terrorism. The American economy, in my opinion, was moving in a far better direction for the good of the entire nation.

The reason the United States has to occupy various countries is because of the behavior of these foreign countries, or more specifically, the mismanaged testosterone of the male dominated societies, as opposed to the behavior of the United States, as we have an advanced way of managing the adolescent male population, although all Americans would prefer not to have their sons and daughters in these countries. Ahmadinejad projects the unfair and often ruthless behaviors of his own people and the people of his neighbors onto our US President. One must look at one’s self and examine one’s own behavior and weigh this against a clear understanding of right and wrong.

No leader is going to permit their country to be unfairly attacked without some degree of retaliation and certainly Ahmadinejad is smart enough to see this. I think if one looked back into the past of one’s own country to examine the actions of their own they would discover that one is no less bellicose than one purported the US President to be.

The US is far from being a militant, warmongering country. We only seek to protect our citizens as we see best. I hope Ahmadinejad’s view of our country changes for the better in the near future.

The Battlefield For My Mind…

2011-07-16T15:23:00.001-04:00

Why should it be called a battlefield? My mind is the landscape by which I navigate through my daily life. It becomes a battlefield when it contains conflicting information I have processed from my environment like viewing a beer commercial which tries to sell me on the idea of a cold beer and then reading information that tells me consuming alcohol is bad for my health or having parents who disagree on many issues important in my life. Whenever certain triggers appear it will set this battle in motion and of course the messages more frequently programmed and with the most pleasure, are the strongest and will win the battle in the landscape of my mind.

Splitting and Projection

Splitting is most often an unconscious process that begins in infancy and continues until one becomes aware of it or is trained to stop it. When splitting occurs and something is put into the split off parts there is further potential for splitting, depending on the material put in to that part. If violence is put into the split off parts, then de-realization and dissociation will result, especially in a developing ego and has this potential in a weak ego. One’s enthusiasm for some product such as alcohol or cigarettes can be put into the split off part or even some threat to another can be programmed into the split off parts. The one to whom these split off parts are projected may not be conscious of these projections but might assume they belong to the self, what Melanie Klein defined as projective identification.

My father was a WWII veteran and suffered from undiagnosed post traumatic stress disorder. One afternoon as my aunt and father were driving home from visiting friends, she accidentally ran over a pig killing it. My father became overly distraught and made her stop the car at which time he moved the pig from the highway. When he returned to the car he broke down crying, then disclosed the terrifying memories of his experiences in Okinawa and Iwo Jima, having witnessed the bodies of his dead comrades floating about the LST on which he was assigned. After that my aunt suffered frequent bouts of anxiety and tremendous headaches [I have suffered these headaches as well] for which she was treated with Demerol and other sedatives, he had transferred his emotional state to my Aunt, putting his thoughts and feelings into her brain and mind that created her awareness and distress. This may have contributed to her heart stopping while giving birth to her first son who was also riddled with bouts of anxiety. She frequently viewed The Andy Griffith Show, as did our family, which may have helped counter the training my father received during the war to help prevent the children from wanting to harm others. The landscape of his mind was in conflict, acting in a manner to protect his country and his own social and moral compass. Only the strongest would win. The television did not alter his behavior as he was also blind so this tells us that it was the content of the mind that contributed the most to his behavior.

My mind, the one I cultivated, belongs to me, the one who possesses it. My intellectual property need not be copyrighted for it to be considered one’s intellectual property, usually weeded through at night in our dreams, although this is where excuse upon excuse is made by writers, artists, designers, etc, in order to claim rights to a property which may not be their own.

Not only can things be put into split off parts but things can be taken out, why most writers and artists confess to being child molesters, “like taking candy from a baby”, as very young children are the ones targeted for their fantastic fantasies. While they may be the target of the majority of fantasy works, splitting can continue unless appropriately managed. This means that adolescents and adults alike can be subjected to the same putting in and taking out. This means that any ideas one has cultivated can be taken out (stolen) and used as the property of another. What gets put back in is “let’s watch television”, or “let’s listen to the radio”, “let’s read this book”, the so called subliminal messages, or whatever continues the promotion of what is being done. “Oh your listening to free radio, we have to take that out”, and any ideas you may have had are mixed up with what you’ve heard, so now we get the gist of the game (another excuse for not taking responsibility for their criminal behavior). It is likely to happen mostly at night while one is asleep, why one does not recall dreams, “forget about it”. Programming this into the brain can reduce the capacity to recall important information. Re-programming the brain to remember can can create a conflict in the landscape of the mind. What do I remember, then the mind is taken up with all manner of processing to sort this out. This is why I have found dream content I know does not belong to me nor has anything to do with my waking life and this is again why one fails to recall dream content, as I have clearly proven that one is capable of recalling dreams in great detail. When one is then filled with television one’s brain synapses are used to recreate that which has been put into the brain, that content then must be removed because of so called copyright laws. There is no win win situation here, only one is the winner and it’s a double whammy on the victim.

If the intent of television viewing, [also a great tool for promoting splitting] is to improve one’s personality or psychology then why create splitting? The intellectual processing and content created in the mind surely belongs to the viewer to which no one has rights unless granted by the one who possesses the thoughts. This also would seem the case to me with regard to tangible property one possesses with which one finds flaws, excluding human beings, as possessing a human being falls under the category of slavery, a civil rights issue. To wait for another to improve one’s life when one is capable, is tantamount to suicide in my opinion, particularly since the nature of the human brain is life sustaining. Why would one desire to give that authority to an unknown? That again leaves one’s life vulnerable to the potential for all manner of problems.

This putting in and taking out can put a tremendous drain on the human brain and mind. It was estimated that the human brain required about 400 calories to function on a daily basis but if you are the subject/object of numerous projections of split off parts, then one may require a much greater amount of calories to survive such an onslaught. The content of this onslaught, such as possibly music, might even require more calories to protect the brain and vital organs. I can’t help but think of Cher who at the beginning of her latest Caesar’s Palace Show was quite plump compared to her typical svelte appearance, excluding the natural weight gain we acquire as we age. At the time it never occurred to me that she had to gain that weight in order to get through three years of performances. A little research gave me some insight and coupled with what I had learned about splitting it was clear her weight gain was necessary. Constantly gaining and losing weight can have serious health effects.

Moderation and quality in pleasure seeking activities or activities that give one a break from reality is the key and what one finds pleasurable should be carefully weighed.

Derealization and Psycho-Drama…

2011-07-12T22:50:00.001-04:00

Derealization refers to an alteration in the perception of one’s surroundings so that a sense of reality of the external world is lost. (APA, 1994).

This is a psychiatric term which refers to a condition that follows some sort of trauma. The definition does not refer specifically to real life trauma, but that is assumed. Suppose one watches a horror movie for the first time and witnesses some gruesome murder or one who is employed as a movie projectionist, as I was, and has to show the movie Texas Chainsaw Massacre, that one has never seen, or by watching the Exorcist. Could a person who has never witnessed such gruesomeness be traumatized by viewing such a movie? Can movies like this trigger past traumas in one's life? Yes. I know they can. And if they experienced any kind of trauma in there personal lives, these kinds of movies only confirm that people are not to be trusted and are nothing more than homocidal sex maniacs. Now, flip this idea over on the otherside and consider one who watches programs like Leave It To Beaver, Father Knows Best, My Three Sons, etc. Is not one's sense of the reality around them going to be altered? Watching this stuff is like downloading a file into your system and it will alter your world. And you often do find genius in some movies because of the way they are written, such as Nuts. It's a real life drama, unfortunately Draper in the film, had to commit manslaughter to be heard.

Streisand fell short in her movie Prince of Tides, when she crossed the line as a psychiatrist and acted out, sexually with her patient Tom, portrayed by Nick Nolte (see Transference, Counter-transference by Schwartz-Salant and Transference and Counter-transference by Heinrich Racker), but the cinematography is exceptional. Sexual acting out in therapeutic relationships does happen but not that often and in terms of movie making, if it didn't happen, it would be a boring story and this is where Hollywood drops the ball. In Nuts we are lead to believe that therapy and sanity can be acquired only by committing a crime and engaging in the subsequent courtroom drama and what Prince of Tides relates to the viewing audience is inappropriate, unhealthy and unprofessional and it is in fact, the same crime that Draper's father committed against her in Nuts.

The only reason I am aware of this is because I read these books? How many people are going to read books on Transference or Counter-transference?

CADD: Children Against Drunk Driving

2011-07-12T20:07:00.001-04:00

Henry pulls on his coat and heads toward the front door, "I’m going out for awhile Jan". "Ok Henry, when will you be back", Jan asks. "In a couple of hours"! "Can we go daddy", Kate asks. Yea, Martha yells, "I wanna go to daddy". "Yea, yea, ok, you can go too". "Come on girls, let’s hit the road". The girls climb into the back seat of the car and off they go.

Minutes later they arrive in front of Henry’s favorite pub. "Where are we daddy", Martha asked. "I have to go in here for a minute girls", Henry replied. "You wait here in the car and don’t get out, do you understand"? "Yes sir", the girls chimed. The minutes become hours. "What’s taking so long", Martha asked Kate. "I don’t know, what do you think I am, a genius or something", Kate retorted. "Well I am going to go see what Daddy is doing", Martha replied. "No", Kate ordered, "you know what daddy said". "I’m bigger, I’ll go see, you stay here". "I wanna go too", Martha whined. She started to cry. "Ok, ok, we can go together", Kate cajoled her sister, "stay behind me, ok?" "Ok", Martha whimpered. Kate reluctantly pushes the front seat up and opens the door of the pink dodge. Her black patent leather shoes glisten in the sunlight as her feet hit the pavement. Martha is in pursuit. Just as they reach the entrance to the pub, the door swings open and out steps their father. Kate and Martha freeze. "What are you two doing out of the car"? "I thought I told you to stay in the car", Henry slurred. Henry had more than a few drinks in the pub. Kate says angrily, "you were taking so long", "we want to go home"! "Ok, ok", Henry murmured, "get in the car". The girls run back to the car and climb into the back seat again.

Everything was fine until they turned into the new housing development where they had moved a few years earlier. The road curved sharply to the right, but Henry didn’t make the turn in time and drove onto the curb on the other side of the street and crashed into the light pole. The girls were thrown into the front seat of the car from the impact. Henry laughed a drunken laugh and started to back the car up. "Stop the car", Kate said. Kate and Martha were not hurt but more frightened than anything. Kate glared at her father. She was furious. She grabbed Martha by the hand, "come on lets get out". They climbed out of the car and walked home. They were lucky.©

Kay F Gibbs March 2000

“I love this blog…”

2011-07-11T21:29:00.001-04:00

Don’t know who you are but, believe me I had some help getting some sanity here so that I could even begin to write about anything that was happening to me. Most of the people trying to clean up were merely guessing as I was not a talker at all, not deaf and dumb like Mr. Anderson in Suspect. Because of this things just kept piling up until I couldn’t think about anything and it was suggested that I start writing which I did a little, now I can’t seem to stop.

From what I have learned this is the result of my developmental issues and cows and chickens don’t talk do they?

ACLU forum discussion:

2011-07-09T10:55:00.001-04:00

Wednesday, May 12, 2004

DG said, "Let us assume, for example, that the rules for conviction are relaxed, and that ten more innocent people are put to death by the state as a result. If eleven less people are killed by criminals as another result of the same action, then we have gained and our system is more optimal than it was before. "

___________________________________________

Kay replied..."The penal system was established as a means of punishment. Over the decades the methods of punishment used by parents in raising their children have changed. Beating, threatening, ad nauseum decidedly didn't work. So it was with the penal system. Flogging, hanging, cutting off heads, dragging folks through streets, lopping off hands, poking out eyes, and god knows what ever else was devised as a means to deter crime did not reduce crime. If the truth be known, they probably ran out of vagrants and degenerates to bear the burden of normal society's projections. The major problem with your theory is that you have an erroneous premise.

First we must change the current thinking of society at large with regard to the fallacies in the present standard for punishment and what the current notion of a criminal is. How do we do that? Educate. Secondly, many criminals were victims of some parental violence or neglect or too much TV, and most of them were decidedly acting out, see Acting Out, The Neurosis of Our Time, by Goldman and Milman. This is an academic book, written in 1973. How many people, who found themselves in trouble with the law, had knowledge that they might be acting out? This is knowledge that has been reserved only for psychologists, psychiatrists and counselors. How do we optimize the prevention criterion for this problem? Educate.

Now what happens when we really begin to educate people about themselves. We get a big reduction in crime. Oh boy, yippee! But wait. What happens when we get that big reduction in crime? Oh no, not that! Yes I'm afraid so. The prison budget goes down. In NC in 1997, the State received $30,000 for every person that walked through the gates of a prison. This is another standard that could use some readjustment. With this increase in knowledge we would also get fewer people sitting in counselors and psychiatrists offices.

Oh dear what shall I do, I haven't anyone to treat, how will I eat? Get a real job!

Crime and familial dysfunction, alcoholism, drug abuse, etc., is all big business and we are selectively killing people in the name of Capitalism and some would argue which came first the chicken or the egg? If we really wanted to reduce crime, it could be done in short order. Americans are known for their ingenuity and genius in problem solving, when they want to solve the problem. Hell we can even clone ourselves and who knows how long that has really been going on. It is quite perspicuous that scientific research goes on without public knowledge, until they decide when to let us know or they either have no choice about it. There is the huge collective defense mechanism of the bourgeoisie in action that prevents these true and lasting changes from taking place. Capitalism is a poor excuse to keep crime around.©

Dr. David Bohm and Dr. David Peat put it quite clearly in their book, Science, Order and Creativity,

“with regard to misguiding one's creative potential, to the oppression of one's creative potential and the seduction of one's creative potential for monetary gain, which result in violence and destructiveness.” You may also be interested in reading Crimes of Obedience, by Hamilton and Kelman, chapter, 4 The Structure of Authority; chapter, 5 The Dynamics of Authority and chapter, 8; Responsibility in Authority Situations.

From chapter, 6 Challenging Authority:

"Groups of people who are systematically demonized, assigned to inferior or dangerous categories, and identified by derogatory labels are readily excluded from the bonds of human empathy and the protection of moral and legal precepts."

From Robert Young's, The Ubiquity of Psychotic Anxieties.

("We split off these feelings and try to confine them to scapegoats called ‘psychotics’. I suggest that much official psychopathology and classification serve defensive purposes and protect us from psychotic anxieties. These are forms of control which - like the banishment of purposes and goals in scientific explanation - sequester existential risk and politics and drive underground the legitimate angst of suffering people.)"

I am totally ignorant in the study of Philosophy. My personal thoughts, theories and ideas come from my personal experiences and what I have observed in our society. I just read this document posted on the web, regarding the different theories of the Law of Communism. I was taken aback when I read this description of the "Theory of Marxism. In my observation it describes what we in reality have here in America, as opposed to Democracy. It is as follows:

"THE COMMUNIST THEORY OF LAW ,BY HANS KELSEN

NEW YORK FREDERICK A. PRAEGER, Inc. 1955

THE MARX-ENGELS THEORY OF STATE AND LAW

Primacy of economics over politics in the Marxian theory of the bourgeois (capitalist) state.

The Marxian theory of law is inseparably connected with the theory of state. 1 It is based on the assumption that the economic production and the social relationships constituted by it (the Produktionsverhaeltnisse) determine the coming into existence as well as the disappearance of state and law. Neither phenomenon is an essential element of human society; they exist only under definite economic conditions, namely when the means of production are at the exclusive disposition of a minority of individuals who use or misuse this privilege for the purpose of exploiting the overwhelming majority. This implies the division of society into two groups of antagonistic economic interests, two 'classes', the class of the exploiting owners of the means of production and the class of the exploited workers.
This is especially the situation of a society where the economic system of capitalism prevails and society is split into the two classes of the bourgeois (capitalists) and the proletariat. The state together with its law is the coercive machinery for the maintenance of exploitation of one class by the other, an instrument of the class of exploiters which, through the state and its law, becomes the politically dominant class. The state is the power established for the purpose of keeping the conflict between the dominant and the dominated class 'within the bounds of "order"'. 2 This 'order' is the law, which -- according to this view -- although something different from the state, is in essential connection with the state. The state is 'normally the state of the most powerful economically ruling class, which by its means becomes also the politically ruling class, and thus acquires new means of holding down and exploiting the oppressed class'. 3That means that the political power of the bourgeoisie is the effect of its economic power, that the bourgeoisie becomes the political ruling class because it is the economically ruling class. "

I also just finished reading Eric Rise's book, The Martinsville Seven, Race, Rape and Capital Punishment. This same theory (Marxism) seems prevalent throughout the course of the trial of these seven men. Even the NAACP and the CRC which attempted to obtain clemency for the seven convicted men, exploited them. Had they approached their cases with a totally different attitude and a different premise, they could have changed the law and those seven men may have lived to tell their own stories. I'm surprised that the American people still allow this to go on. ©

And in Lenin's Theory he states, "it is clear that where there is suppression there is also violence, there is no liberty, no democracy'", and this follows what Bohm and Peat state with regard to the suppression or oppression of one's creativity or the exploitation of one's creativity for monetary gain. So even Lenin recognized that oppression destroyed man's creative potential.

Is anybody but the rich paying attention to what is going on in America? We still have these little Leopolds and Loebs walking around, only now they don't actually commit the crimes they just think about it and then those thoughts get passed on to some other poor schmuck who acts it out and then gets locked up before he even knows what or rather who hit him.

Kay F Gibbs

Tuesday, May 11, 2004

Rights of newborns…

2011-07-09T10:31:00.001-04:00

Why don't we get right down to the REAL issue here. Why isn't the ACLU fighting for the rights of newborn infants to be breast fed by their mothers? I would guess that 90% of the smokers have, not only an addiction to nicotine, but they suffer from an oral fixation, most likely because they were not breast fed as infants or they were abandoned at some early stage in their development and that my friends, constitutes a developmental disability. That is the reason so many unhealthy heterosexual and homosexual relationships exist, they become symbiotic and that is why many people view gay relationships as unhealthy, because that is what they see most often.

It is obvious that the anti-smoking campaign was really about non-smokers who were being affected by the second-hand smoke and they simply used the worst cases of death by smoking to push their agenda. They were not only affected by the second-hand smoke, but more to the point, they found themselves entangled in a dance with a people who had not developed beyond infancy, psychologically and they found themselves always in a parenting position with those of us who have been the victims of such cruelty. It was costing the non-smoker more than he bargained for, but Hollywood and the publishing industry found a way to exploit us for profit. Never mind what the smoker him or herself must be going through. Ask Charles Manson, who got a glimpse of what was really happening when in the court room during the Tate, La Bianca Murder trial he said, "we are garbage people". He must have realized on some level that he was being victimized and I suspect he was acting out something like the Chicago 8 (later known as the Chicago 7 ) or the Martinsville Seven scenes. Actually I also believe the Chicago Seven were acting out stuff from the Martinsville Seven rape and trial. He and his followers were acting out, autistic acting out ! Manson was trying to show his followers something that he was unable to verbalize. None of this was presented to the courts in Manson's defense. They wanted to believe that Manson was a cold blooded killer. Manson had been robbed of his positive creative outlet (his guitar playing) and so his creativity took on a destructive nature, just as Dr. David Bohm and Dr. David Peat mention in their book Science, Order and Creativity. In my own history I uncovered the truth about not being breast fed and how children who are not breast fed develop a fixation on hands as opposed to breasts, at least in my case. See my article on Phantasy vs. Fantasy. This is another means in which we are exploited and personally I am even suspect of the existence of any genetic homosexual activity (which has nothing to do with this discussion, but is worth mentioning), because there is evidence that first born children were ripped from their mothers at birth and their mouths and anuses were perverted for purely sexual gratification at some point in the early history of mankind, maybe Tophet spoken about in the Book of Kings in the Bible, (but was too heinous an event to allow in the Bible of today and could have been edited out), a certain possibility that is acted out even today in our country. Generally, our first real knowledge of first borns being sacrificed (another script that is still acted out today) was by King Herod, but was this a re-enactment of Tophet and/or did soldiers carrying out their orders, take advantage of the situation and sexually abuse these babies? These are obviously questions Historians have to sort out for conclusive evidence. And our religious leaders who support Christianity and the Jews support this kind of exploitation and sacrificing of human lives. Just look at the military. The Government hasn't stopped tobacco farmers from producing a product that the FDA would not approve for the consumption of any human. What about this major contradiction in our government? Yet they condemn abortion. It's ok to kill yourself even if you don't know what you are doing or you might be addicted, is the message they are sending.

I found an article on the internet that went into detail about the Martinsville Seven, but I can no longer find it. I've torn down my hard drive since first locating the web page and lost the bookmark, sorry. I do recall in the article, that the rapists had been quoted as using similar language that Manson used in which he referred to the Police as "PIGS" and just before the execution of the Martinsville Seven, there were similar writings, as published in the Newspaper article.

Personally, I have reason to suspect that the Government has been behind the idea of not breast feeding children and it has even been publicized in the past that not breast feeding your child is ok. IT IS NOT OK. Breast feeding is not only important to the physical wellbeing of your child but to his or her psychological well being also and I believe it is a violation of the infants fundamental right to life! Those of us who are unfortunate enough to be in this category are caught between the left wing religious zealots and the right wing liberals and we are being battered. Anti-abortionists are obsessed with taking a life before birth, but you don't see them toting banners and marching up and down the streets for the newborns right to be breast fed! It is ok to do whatever you wish with a human life after it is born, but god forbid should you kill a fetus. Why have religious leaders not taken up this cause? Why do they not fight for the rights of these children? Could it be an unspoken law of Christianity, Judaism? Or is it that they just wish to keep this knowledge among themselves, for obvious reasons. There could be a rash of lawsuits against the government.

I believe the government was involved in (as in funding) some sort of experiment on the effects of not breast feeding a child and probably hundreds of thousands of us (yes I am one of them) were victimized before we even had a chance to speak for ourselves.

That's a lie. That's not what I really believe. What I really believe is that psychiatrists and psychoanalysts have known that breast feeding causes all sorts of psychological problems and they have been lying to the American public about it for decades and they have been lying about the fact that not breast feeding your child can be a cause of Autism. They have known that cigarettes were unhealthy since 1939? What the hell took them so long to do something about it? How many lives were lost in the mean time? It is obvious that they were using it as a means of keeping down the population because of the very issues we are facing right now with Social Security and the about to retire baby boomers. Remember Leopold and Loeb? We have a lot of them in Psychology and Psychiatry and they are out to satisfy their own personal curiosity and sometimes satisfying their need for revenge. My personal experience confirms this fact. So it isn't about you it is about them and some need they have. Is this healthy and is it promoting mental health? And our government leaders are not setting examples of much in the way of mental health either, which affects a large part of our population. I question that and I question Freud's (the father of psychiatry) commitment to his patients as opposed to a commitment to his own agenda and freeing himself from his own collective history and using his patients to do it, just like I have discovered other therapists doing the same thing. Think about it. Everything Freud created about the oedipal complex can be found in the history of Moses, the freedom leader of the Jews (an I think his role was coerced). How can another's mental processes apply to mine. My mental processes may be different. I loved both my parents equally and I only hated the way they were doing things, I did not hate them, nor did I wish to kill them.

I believe Psycho-analysis, which seeks to uncover those mental processes that have gone awry, to be the most effective in treating a mental problem, not pills. Freud's research is based upon his own history. How can his history help me? When they talk about scripts and how we all have them, we do not see others for who they really are, but we see them through the eyes of our own experiences and many people have been harmed because of this mind-blindness. Now, according to Dr. Steven Pinker this theory does not hold true for autistic children (Dr. Steven Pinker's book, How the Mind Works, with regard to autism and comparing autistics to normal children. He says, " if a normal child sees a rubber duck in the bath tub, and a photographer then removes the duck and places it on the bed and takes a picture of it, the normal child will believe the picture will show the duck in the bathtub, the autistic child will not".), the autistic child follows the hand.

I smoked for 16 years but I had no idea I was acting out, until I began reading about Melanie Klein and her ideas. I was stuck psychologically and I not only was acting out by smoking but with drinking as well. I had tried self-hypnosis tapes, exercise, groups, but nothing gave me the understanding I needed until I read these books on projective identification, acting out, attachment and child development, etc. I haven't had a drink of alcohol nor had the desire since learning of this in the past three years, and I haven't had the support of a group of any kind.

And now, the Establishment has gotten one of the most reputable Medical Facilites in the world to announce that they have discovered an Autism Gene. What a crock. They are trying to cover up the fact that they have been using and abusing us, experimenting and researching all kinds of mental phenomena and denying that the main cause of our disorder is lack of breast feeding. I have had enough and I say that it is time to take action.©

Kay F Gibbs

Wednesday, May 12, 2004

On our rights to privacy and prisoner rights posted on the ACLU Forum - May 13, 2004…

2011-07-09T10:21:00.001-04:00

Well there is a statute, or there used to be (the laws change so quickly without notification to the Public, that you really have to question who is in control and who is getting the benefit of these changes) that goes something like this, US Civil Code 42 § 552a-g, which protects any information held by the government about you and prevents that information from being disclosed to anyone without your permission and also gives you the right to bring suit against the Federal Government if that information is misused. I don't think this applies to cases of terrorism.

You also have the right to access any file about you, held by the federal government. I personally am a strong supporter of the "right to privacy". I do not believe it is fair to the majority of citizens who abide by the law for the most part to have their lives subjected to such Governmental or Corporate scrutiny of any nature and anyone can become a suspect at any time, given the right circumstances, whether one is guilty or not. Certainly plenty of malicious rumors could be spread, enough to cast suspicion upon any innocent person or one could be the victim of some crafty psychological game and once these suspicions are cast one's life becomes affected. Then one has to spend untold amounts of money and precious time proving that he or she is not as he or she has been accused.

It is my further opinion that the willful and deliberate invasion of anyone's privacy without first being charged with a crime, is illegal, period. It is not only a crime, but it is an offense to the sensibilities of every citizen who abides by the law and to those men and women who gave and give their lives in defense of all our freedoms.

It is clearly evident that our rights to privacy have become willfully and deliberately obscured. What is the pay-off and who is the pay-off benefiting? Those who would violate and profit from your privacy. If they are so willing to violate your privacy, what's to stop them from using your information for profit? What's to stop anyone from going down to the magistrate and making a false charge on you, obtaining a warrant and having you incarcerated? Particularly if you are a persuasive liar and present with all the sincerity of the victim of an awful crime? I was the victim of such a scheme and spent in excess of 6 months in jail because of it. Now, for all appearances, a writer can exploit that story for profit. The deception would make (and probably did, I just haven't found it yet) a great script for any prime time show.

Projections are a natural occurrence in the psychological development of an infant. They are not normal in an adult. If one cannot defend one's self against them, one will become a victim of them, and those who are the most malicious in their efforts to project will draw into their games, those who can and will inflict pain, for them, onto the projected self (contained by an innocent person, and is otherwise directed at the innocent containee), pain that the projector cannot or will not tolerate or endure himself, were he or she honest and held him or herself accountable. And in this instance, the court is aiding and abetting a crime in my opinion. This is a popular game with White Collar America like those who stay in motels equivalent to the swankest Federal Prison and are too sheik to stay at Motel 6, yet they are no less capable or guilty than you or I of committing even the most trivial of crimes.

I'm all for the rights of the accused and his or her rights after he or she is convicted, but they have made a grave mistake by allowing TV and radios in jails and prisons. These items do nothing but distract an individual from looking at oneself and why one is where they are. In my personal opinion, prisons have become nothing more than your most basic Motel 6. In fact I found it to be little different than my freshman college dorm, only prison is more violent and I didn't have a TV during my college years. And as I recall Jarvis Hall did not have airconditioning either.

This is what happened "In The Beginning". Moses denied the criminal side of himself, casting evil into the world as Satan, when he killed the Egyptian slave, spreading that sin, guilt and shame among his people. Then his act of sin was cast upon his sons Cain and Abel, who acted it out, resulting in the death of Abel. Thus the evolution of the theater.©

And like Ian Anderson's Hymn 43, from AquaLung says:

Oh father high in heaven -- smile down upon your son

whose busy with his money games -- his women and his gun.

Oh Jesus save me!

And the unsung Western hero killed an Indian or three

and made his name in Hollywood

to set the white man free.

Oh Jesus save me!

If Jesus saves -- well, He'd better save Himself

from the gory glory seekers who use His name in death.

Oh Jesus save me!

I saw him in the city and on the mountains of the moon --

His cross was rather bloody --

He could hardly roll His stone.

Oh Jesus save me!

Home, home on the range (where the majority of us in America don't live)

Where the deer and the antelope play (isn't that nice)

Where rarely is heard (turn up your hearing aid)

A disparaging word (oh if it were only true)

And the skies are not cloudy all day (its been raining here for the past four days)

I reserve all rights to my posts.

“I don't have a problem with authority, I have a problem with the misuse of it".

Kay F Gibbs

What I mean by acting out…updated

2011-06-27T18:09:00.001-04:00

Excerpt from Acting Out, The Neurosis of Our Time, Milman and Goldman…

Freud originally defined acting out as the compelling urge to repeat the forgotten past. This definition raises a number of important questions. First of all, what aspect of the past is being repeated in acting out. Is it an actual event, or is it a fantasy which persists from childhood? On this point Freud is silent. At other stages in his work, Freud repeatedly was faced with the question about whether the individual or the group was reacting to a memory or a fantasy. It will be recalled that the major thrust of his work from the early days was to recall actual memories, but it became more and more impossible to recall these memories, then replaced that demand by the need to reconstruct the event in the known material. In the paper cited, on "Remembering, Healing and Working Through," for the first time he saw the working through of resistances as the hallmark of analysis…

Thus it is really not the memory that becomes important but ego's capacity to tolerate a memory. Sullivan once said that, “ it is not the trauma, but the scar”. Memory arouses such a strong emotional reaction in the patient that he cannot sit back quietly and tolerate it; accordingly he tries to resort to some action which will obliterate this memory from consciousness. This is why acting-out patients produce so few memories, and the memories they do produce are particularly significant. By contrast, in the inhibited patient, action is held back by a variety of fears; many times these patients are outright phobic.Sometimes these patients produce many memories, sometimes they do not. Here the passivity is just as serious a problem as activity in the acting-out patient. Thus again the differentiation does not lie in the action as such, but in the strength of the ego.

What this means is this, by the nature of our brains, memories are created, from our environment (conversations with friends), television radio or whatever we see and hear. When we consume foods that contain protein, it gets broken down into amino acids that get folded into various other more complex proteins such neurotransmitters that permit us to learn and recall information. Some proteins like leucine, a branched chain amino acid, produce chemicals like glutamate, and has a direct affect on the brain and long term potentiation. Methionine is another amino acid that gets folded into a configuration called acetylcholine. Acetylcholine when released into the synaptic gap, causes the brain to recall information we have collected via our eyes and ears.

If you elevate levels of glutamate, it could deplete levels of acetylcholine, causing an inability to recall information. Elevating levels of glutamate can cause neurotoxicity and damage to neurons. GABA is also a neurotransmitter formed from glutamate and glutamine. It is a neuroinhibitory transmitter and helps regulate the firing of neurons by glutamate.

Sometimes when our brains are activated by these transmitters, some people will act out something stored in their memory which they have forgotten and because it has been acted out, they can no longer recall it. But if one recalls what they acted out, then the memory will be retained but in some altered form. Fantasies are formed in a different way, by one’s will to create the fantasy driven by some desire such as jealousy, envy, love or hate. Sometimes people act out their fantasies. Sometimes shame or guilt prevent us from talking about our fantasies, thus possibly causing others to act out our fantasies. These can be good and productive fantasies or negative and harmful fantasies.

If we have seen something on the television that is particularly frightening or even novel, we may become traumatized or thrilled, which triggers the brain to release various chemicals in the synaptic gap which then sends a signal to other parts of the body, speeding up our heart rate and releasing stress hormones like cortisol, ( Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, A Clinical Review), that causes us to pay particular attention to the action going on. This in turn causes us to develop a stronger memory of that incident or behavior that we may act out later. Other memories can be created by passive attention to what is going on, all is being taken in by the brain and thus can be recalled or acted out. This is why I threw the plant off my deck, as it might have been part of the content of the mind of someone else.

Having taken excessive amounts of leucine is why I requested the Klonopin as the high levels of glutamate prevented me from sleeping. And it is my contention that the benzodiazepines are better at blocking the long term potentiation, especially for those who do view television. Merely instructing someone to forget something does not automatically release GABA into the synapse thus promoting inhibition of the memory. Not only had I taken the leucine but I also had taken 1000 mgs of choline daily for over a month but for other purposes than to increase recall. Habituation can occur if the same neurons are fired repeatedly causing the neurons to remain wired together. This is another reason I felt some benzodiazepine would be more affective which I proved by taking GABA, glycine and taurine, internally but their effects are not long lasting and GABA gets converted back into glutamate which then creates more neuronal excitability and the other amino acids in elevated levels can cause other problems.

I am also of the opinion that this kind of acting out has been construed with emotional acting out in which one will act up when one is emotionally distressed rather than talking about one’s feelings. In my writings I am referring to the above described not emotional acting out. In my Commentary on the film, Death In Love, I do mention this kind of acting out. I.D. Magazine has an interesting article on Buyology, a New Menace Invading Your Brain, which promotes acting out. This can create conflict in the human brain and mind possibly exhibiting itself as an inability to make decisions or take actions that would be in one’s own best interest.

This is what I have been teaching myself along with other things over the past 10 years.

Kay’s Commentary

Primed to Act

Speaking of transferences

2011-06-18T19:23:00.001-04:00

as in transferences that excite the senses so that one desires to indulge in various activities. If one is not aware of these propensities in our social lives then one may become victim of them and thus create the unwanted habit all over again.

What's In Your Brain? What's In Your Mind?: I still disagree with the genetic predetermination theory…

AA Good or Evil

I am reminded of one of my favorite Bisset films, Rich and Famous, when it comes to transferences although I never understood the process that was going on between them in psychological terms. In the film Bisset becomes a famous writer with a reputation and Bergen her closest friend a career woman. Throughout the film they converse and battle with each other. Bergen’s character decides to write and pens a novel that brings great wealth while Bisset’s character finds herself unable to write at all.

This seems to personify numerous encounters I have had in my life and what I speak about when I mention transferences and I am sure most actors and actresses in Hollywood can attest to this problem while making films. This of course may have been rectified after Kay Francis’ time with techniques such as split screen. I think careful viewing of this film will enlighten one on this subject.

A discouraging word…

2011-06-18T14:20:00.001-04:00

“Are you queer”?

I am quite disturbed by this question I hear repeatedly. For a country so advanced in so many areas, [we can clone ourselves] it is beyond my comprehension that this word is still used to refer to one’s sexual preference. I have discussed sexual development in Kay’s Commentary. We all go through stages of preferring one parent over the other, quite like a ping pong ball, we bounce back and forth, depending on what the parents do to please or displease us, shaping us into the people we become, mostly based on how we react to our parents and what we are thinking in this process. If we are hurt in a profound way, we make lock ourselves into a position and remain there.

I have come to understand in a very personal way that often forgiving sets one up for more of the same pain, which sometimes meant locking one or the other parent out of my present mental state. This gave rise to the appearance of having a sexual preference in opposition to my physical anatomy.

“Queer” is an inappropriate term in identifying one with sexual preference issues in the 21st century. The word was coined decades ago in reference to individuals who were eccentric, odd in character and manner seeming to be outside the patterns of normal society. They may or may not have been homosexual.

Resolving these issues for myself, personally, became a monumental task with the presence of television in our home that opened doors of possibilities that otherwise were not present. This is not a matter of finding fault, but rather with acknowledging the potential to think beyond the box in which I was living. Unfortunately the box in which I was viewing all this potential, in my generation, was mostly male oriented. It was not until the 70’s that I was exposed to women being something other than distraught housewives and or sex slaves. It has only been recently that I discovered films in which a woman was the boss of her own company, done in the 1940’s by one of my own family. I simply was not exposed to it in my youth. My saving grace was when my father encouraged me to be and do whatever I wanted and told me I was capable of being what ever I wanted, however he had little understanding of the mind and brain, so it is not as simple as just going out and doing it.

Jesus said, “know thyself”. I knew more about characters on television than I did my own family, their talents or my own brain. Jesus was right. The key to being in control of one’s self is knowing one’s self, inside and out.

Nuclear Power is as bad as weapons of mass destruction in my opinion…

2011-06-14T15:34:00.001-04:00

Happy Memorial Day…

2011-05-30T17:07:00.001-04:00

I would like to personally thank all of the Black men and women of America who have contributed to forging our Nation in so many ways. Even though our color is not represented in the American flag, which I find really interesting since my family came here in the 1650’s and evolved from people with black skin, you are thought of and appreciated.

I also disagree with the findings that these children suffer from sexual impulsivity or any promiscuity…update 6

2011-05-22T18:48:00.001-04:00

…and is probably the result of interactions with the perpetrator. I disagree that victims are likely to re-enact trauma on themselves, they are more likely to draw others into their traumatic drama. Any promiscuity is also likely, in my personal opinion based on my experience, a traumatic re-enactment and is clearly different than sexual promiscuity. My disagreement with the borderline personality assessment is that it seems to heap the entirety of the problem onto “over sexualized” children and women, rather than placing the responsibility where it lies. Defense mechanisms being what they are regarding the misdirected sexual urges of adolescent and adult men who are in denial or are ashamed of their own sexual feelings, prefer to act out rather than talk about them. Again they are attacking the breast for their psychological impotence. This is characteristic of the projective identification Melanie Klein discusses in her writings, children become sex objects to be manipulated. I am surprised these findings were allowed to be published in this manner.

Because victims know nothing about abuse and trauma, they buy into the ideas that they have to bear the burden for fixing the problem. These occurrences do not happen because of children. Moreover any fantasizing would only be in regard to wanting to please the adult rather than any desire to have done to them again, what had been done, thus the necessity on other levels to rebel against authority figures.

Response to Bering in Mind on homophobia…

2011-05-22T15:17:00.001-04:00

Bering in Mind: Scientific American Blogs

I expressed some unease with the implications (and insinuations) of Gallup’s line of argument. But I was also rather unabashed in my conviction that his theory, though impolitic, was not only plausible, but also insightful and worth revisiting, particularly now, when homophobia may be too hastily, and simplistically, characterized as "socially learned." To explicate, using the neutral language of evolution, the idea that homophobia may be adaptive, and furthermore that it is adaptive because children exposed to homosexuals may themselves develop same-sex attractions, is a delicate affair, to say the least.

I don’t know about Gallup’s ideas about homophobia, but I do agree with Bering that there is some confusion about homophobia although I disagree that it isn’t always a socially learned behavior or that it isn’t learned in the family. I think there are multitudes of currents that can change the course of a ship without a sail.

The Wikipedia even has a confused definition of the subject:

Homophobia is a range of negative attitudes and feelings towards lesbian and gay and in some cases bisexual, transgender people and behaviour although these are usually covered under biphobia and transphobia. Intersex and asexual people are also sometimes included. Definitions refer variably to antipathy, contempt, prejudice, aversion, and irrational fear.^[1

^{Having read the definition of homophobia in the DSM III many years ago, I understood it to mean that one had an irrational fear of one’s own sexual feelings towards those of one’s own sex which could mean that one has a fear of sexual acting out. This is more a fear of a lack of control rather than a sexual attraction to the same sex. This is quite different from that defined above. The definition did not mention sexual acting out as I recall, but I have read a great deal of material since that time and I have read about such sexual events among therapists and clients in the book Tranference and Countertransference, by Schwartz-Salant and Stein, which is considered sexual acting out and among parent and child would be considered incest.}

^{As I have come to understand homophobia, it does not mean that the people toward which the feelings are projected are necessarily gay or lesbian and nor is asexuality associated with any kind of phobia and nor was I confused about it. This DSM III definition clearly insinuates the behavior could be influenced both within the family as well as socially. I tend to think those families who consider it a social issue are in denial just as are those who blame families for the social problems within our society. When we talk about the subject we forget that we all go through stages of sexual development and if one cannot move through these stages freely without trauma or undue influence then one becomes stuck or trapped. It is the labeling and the stigma attached to those labels at the root of the problem, as I see it, and having had first hand experience of it, I feel I can speak to this subject. In many cases it is likely a bit of both social and familial issues. Labeling a person as this or that, traps them in that behavior. It then does not become a real choice but a burden and as I have learned in various Jungian materials it is usually the oldest who bears the dual personalities of the parents. If they are lucky enough to have a brother and sister, they are saved from it’s energy draining demands.}

^{I just viewed a Hitchcock film, Human Interest Story about an alien who took possession of a human body and then there is the film Invasion of the Body Snatchers and of course Jesus professing to be God, so one might think some asexuals are possessed of some religious figure and so a transgendered person might be possessed of a male personality. This does not insinuate a phobia to me. But again I truly think it is all a stage of development and so an asexual might well be in a primordial stage of development when sex is not even a consideration and I believe Jung addresses this in a metaphorical manner in his writings. The dance isn’t just about anger and rage. There is a dance between the father and son, the father and daughter, as well as the mother and daughter and mother and son. If this dance isn’t completed successfully it can easily be exploited or become misdirected.}

I tend to think it wasn’t the trapped sparrow…updated

2011-05-22T14:05:00.001-04:00

Anecdotes from the Archive: Curious Photos from the Archive: A Hungry Little Bird Gets Stuck in a Breakfast Roll

that put himself in the straight jacket but the other bible thumping sparrows around him. Something so subtle that even the most learned or guilt ridden forget, projections or more likely dissociations. They knew the little thing was starving and left the already half eaten bun for it to pick through the remains. These dissociations would fit in perfectly with the little sparrow’s already bad feelings about itself, so in order to make the little thing feel like a “good little bird”, it accepts these wonderful religious thoughts and ideas as his own, condemning those who are taking advantage of it’s already well developed talents.

The little sparrow was imprisoned by the rest of the flock.

Waiting for God is what’s gotten us into this mess…

2011-05-22T14:02:00.001-04:00

Bering in Mind: "In God We Trust" (At least until the government gets its act together)

...all these sleepy little heads waiting while Fort Knox becomes privately owned and the Government ends up in debt.

Object relations in this film – warning contains strong language…

2011-05-21T14:54:00.001-04:00

Alexandra's Project (2003) - IMDb

To an adult, a cucumber might represent the penis, just as the vibrator is designed to look like a penis. “Stick it up your a**”. Some farmer may have spoken those words to someone wanting a few cucumbers to take home after a hard day of picking or grating them. It could also be as in my own molestation in which the upstairs neighbor’s nephew committed the act of sodomy upon my 6 year old person, thinking of his male member as being like a cucumber or banana.

To an undeveloped child, a cucumber is a cucumber. A banana is a banana, sausage is sausage and a hotdog is a hotdog, all which are frequently used to symbolize the penis. Even sucking on a simple plastic straw has been sexualized, used to symbolize the act of fallatio, “I wish you’d suck my d*** off like that. “I have heard many times “I’ll chop your w**ny(wiener) off and other various euphemisms in response to vulgar commands regarding the same, the derivation of which I cannot determine. Often times it is the young child who is blamed for committing such acts and labeled over sexed, nymphomaniacs, etc, when in fact, the child has been subjected to the traumatic sexual projections of adults around them.

I gained this knowledge after having read Melanie Klein’s The Psychoanalysis of Children in which I disagreed with some of her findings, wondering if she herself had not created the drama amongst the children she studied and then Fairbairn and Grotstein, in which case most of this kind of happening would be part of the splitting and projective identification talked about by James Grotstein. An example might be, say a woman and her young male child are standing in front of the boss asking for a few cucumbers. In his mind he says, “yea and you can stick’em up your a** too”. The boss goes home to his own young boy, forgetting what he said, transfers those thoughts to his son who in playing one day attempts to put something in his rectum that is or resembles a cucumber and/or the woman’s son attempts to do the same.

This is my understanding of what I have read on object relations in the past ten years. My parents used no such vulgar language when I was a child or adolescent, in fact they were both likely autistic or in a stage of parataxic thinking, which of course affected my own psychological development, why I had such a strong reaction to The Exorcist. Why I sought to escape my parents. Changes began when they introduced psychology in my Junior year of high school.

I consider Melanie Klein my savior, a savior of all children subjected to poor thinking of the adults around them. She should be celebrated as much as Martin Luther King, The Pope and any President.

Campbell’s Psychiatric Dictionary

The truth saves us all much pain and suffering…

2011-05-20T12:42:00.001-04:00

Not Marilyn - Garbo and Gibbs/Francis

In 1978 I met Evelyn Fitzgerald. In 1979 I moved to Raleigh, NC with a Jean. In 1983 I left Jean and moved in with Leslie. In 1983 I left. I moved around some more then in 1986 moved home. Started drinking then went to a treatment facility. Moved to the town where the treatment facility is located. Started writing and drawing and keeping a diary. Met Don, started drinking again. Was suicidal went to the Psychiatric hospital. Was there for three months. Treated by Marine or Army Psychiatrist, not sure of his military affiliation but he was a military psychiatrist. Discharged, stayed with a friend for two weeks. This is when I had the stabbing pain in my back as if something were stabbing me. I thought I had a heart attack from the stress but a test showed no damage. Contacted patient in hospital who had offered to rent me a room. I moved in December. Things started out ok. We went to the beach, gave me a pill and we had sex. Then things got worse. She was popping pills and cutting herself. I wanted to leave. We had a fight. she started swinging at me, I pushed her away and left.

I went to my friend’s for awhile and then went back to the house. I got so angry I took a piece of pipe and damaged the property. Drove to the pond and threw the pipe into the pond. Left, went back to friend’s house for a short time. Then I was arrested.

Stopping taxpayer dollars from funding abortions…

2011-05-16T00:24:00.001-04:00

Project Vote Smart - Representative Bachmann on HR 3 - Prohibiting Taxpayer Funding of Abortion

…so they are as much as admitting it’s been done.

Why not prevent tax dollars from funding drug research that is done on mostly the elderly, disabled or those in poverty receiving Medicaid and SSI? It’s part of the deal isn’t it? What about the prevention of tax dollars to fund studies on obscure and irrelevant projects? What about the government funding of life support, only to have that life then terminated in a court of law? And since I brought it up, how is that any different than having an abortion? You want to support one and condemn the other. Just as there is hope for an unwanted child there is hope for those on life support. You don’t force terminally ill people to live but you want to force a woman to give birth driven by envy and jealousy of those who cannot have children of their own. You want to provide abortions but don’t want to provide life support for the terminally ill. Stem cells from a terminated fetus might save the person on life support. You want to provide transplants that are often funded by tax payers but then someone has to die for that organ to be provided, most likely by someone on government assistance.

I don’t condone abortion, I support education and prevention so abortions are not needed nor do I condone the condemnation of those who have fallen prey to the use of it. Doing so is nothing more than an attempt at taking further advantage of their circumstances, heaping sole responsibility on their shoulders.

The spillway to inundate counties in LA, I don’t understand this…

2011-05-13T21:19:00.001-04:00

It's a go: Spillway to inundate Cajun country - Weather - msnbc.com

We educate millions of people in this country who go off to other countries and create impressive machines to prevent events such as this one in Mississippi and what happened in Louisiana during Katrina, and all American engineers can come up with is some lousy cement levees.

SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH THAT. THEN YOU LOOK TO POOR PEOPLE TO COUGH UP THEIR SYNAPSES TO RAISE MONEY TO FIX THE PROBLEM. LOOK TO THE PEOPLE WHO CONTROL THE CASH FLOW FOR HELP.

The rural community I grew up in has been hurting for jobs for decades, they only recently got a city sewer system and we are spending millions of dollars on monuments. I don’t understand the priorities in this country nor what they call a United Nation. United on what front?

What do they see?

2011-04-30T23:09:00.001-04:00

Why Doctors Should Be More Empathetic--But Not Too Much More: Scientific American

What do they see? They see all of that disease they learned about in 8 years of medical school and $. Writers look at us and see a story, though their object seeking is a little less harmful unless they are hacking your brain, then they get into trying to get you to pour all kinds of chemicals into your brain that excite your neurons and elevate your thinking capacity, a foolish means of trying to help someone.

It’s all a higher level of cannibalism, there is a body but you see a meal, one sees an advantage, one sees whatever fits into their goals, wants and desires. These goals are not always evident, they are suppressed thoughts such as elegant nights on a big yacht in the Mediterranean. One might see a person with a beautiful nose, beautiful hair, beautiful big eyes or a big head and seek to get them, lifting, jacking up and all kinds of trickery are evoked. These are all infantile processes, stages we go through as we mature into, hopefully, more socially mature adults. That is soon forgotten when one needs to put food on the table.

What do I see? I see movies and stars often when I look at people, waiting for the climax and resolution to the movie. I see products. I have spent hours at the supermarket gazing at products on the shelf. I should have Harris Teeter’s shelves memorized.

Every time I cross the street on my way to the Mall there is a movie that is triggered in the back of my mind, like someone walking to death row, Madam X maybe. It used to be freedom from the four walls of my apartment. Leaving the mall and walking home across the street might evoke memories of Barbra Streisand’s Nuts, walking to freedom now. It’s things like this that are going on in my mind. Attempts I have made to alter this thinking by attending college and forcing my neurons to think of something different have been thwarted. I feel as if I have been hostage, prisoner. It is frustrating and infuriating when I am attacked by those who would seek to profit from my mind.

It all makes me feel like Draper in Nuts when she’s making her first court appearance and she passes by all those men pawing at her through the cell bars. The symbolism makes one think Draper is untouchable, they are grabbing at her but they never touch her. Isn’t this like some Doctors?

Simulated or pre-programming to act…

2011-04-30T22:21:00.001-04:00

Indeed, some theorists
now propose that the function of explicit, conscious memory
is to simulate future, potential actions (Schacter&Addis, 2007).

Kay's Commentary

Think of “simulating future potentials” this way. You are viewing a movie about a robbery and the victim shoots the thief. You have prepared your brain to react in that manner if you should be robbed. Now if you viewed that film repeatedly you would cement that impulse in your mind and most likely would do just that, unless you also programmed something like, “yea and go to jail for manslaughter, no thanks”. This is all fine if you are a writer, if you aren’t you are asking for trouble. It works the same way with viewing exercise shows, cooking shows, etc.

I am well aware of the “potential actions” even though I have never seen many of the things I have re-enacted, however distorted they might be.

I think the purpose of conscious memory is to potentiate future actions as opposed to simulating. If one wishes to avoid certain future actions, then one might repress or dissociate those actions, why I re-enacted something someone else saw on the television or at the theater.

This future potential is what set me off on that Egyptian trail and viewing all those NG documentaries after having viewed a season of Relic Hunter.

Simulations like my niece’s PS2 car video games can be more helpful. She became extremely skillful at maneuvering through the streets whereas I was quite challenged due to lack of use of the game. This the positive side of simulations.

Having viewed quite a few cop shows you would have to wonder how I ended up in prison.

And more…

2011-04-28T00:46:00.001-04:00

Kay's Commentary: Can you believe this?

Movies were made from the incidents between us, Mumford and one I wrote the studios about but the letters were returned undeliverable. Of course this would happen. I still have the letters stamped by the Post Office.

Susan Anne Warren Becker used me to get her life’s dirty laundry cleaned up so her daughter wouldn’t have to go through it and I guess helping me get the college loan was suppose to be the payment for it. Great payment, I end up in prison, jail, psychiatric hospitals, raped, beat up and homeless. No education and no degree with which to obtain a job to support myself. No I find no humor in this at all.

This is what your tax dollars are used for by your therapists and psychologists who treat people with low incomes and needing help. Susan Anne Warren Becker obtained a degree in psychology before I met her.

For the more serious side…

2011-04-27T21:22:00.001-04:00

I am still unaffiliated with a party and Obama and Trump are not making it any easier. I am more confused now than I was decades ago. What is really going on and what we are told is going to happen are often football fields apart.

We all claim to be concerned about the future of our environment which makes me think we should be more conservative, not just with money but with over-consumption and waste, that greatly affect our environment, yet we are encouraged day after day to buy the latest hottest items on the market that are suppose to make our lives easier.

We should find a way to create jobs that won’t contribute to our environmental problems. We should have affordable healthcare for everyone. We should have safe affordable housing for everyone. This is an issue I am personally associated with. I recently perused the Federal Housing and Urban Development (HUD) website. I was surprised to find there was no place for complaints and no one who over sees the inspection of properties on a Federal level. I have lived in some very nice places when I was employed. When I became disabled, the properties available to me were often not taken care of properly or down right filthy. I went through this when I rented a house, while employed that was filthy and rundown. I put in a lot of hours cleaning, painting and landscaping. The landlord went up on the rent. I moved which was a mistake but I was so furious I felt if I had to look at the walls another year I wouldn’t be able to look myself in the face again. She got the work done for free which would have cost her nearly $5000.00 with all we did. Taking her to court might have resolved the matter if we had documented our time or agreed in writing to do the work for a reduction in the rent. That’s what one gets for banking on others to be fair. I still get this sick feeling in the pit of my stomach when I think about it.

I have never considered myself an unjust person and have never treated others in an unjust manner, in fact I have gone above and beyond with others often when I shouldn’t have. I feel there are many people like me who simply endure without making too much noise about it. Not just decent, but safe housing isn’t too much to ask for but hard to find when you are reliant on housing assistance in the form of vouchers and certificates. It took me 7 years (1991-1999) to have enough income and then get that help, mean while I lived in my car, in motels or on the street.

So I am more inclined to vote Independent at the risk of casting a loosing vote, despite Obama’s positive steps toward turning the country around and the more sensible conservative nature of the Republican party needed to return our economy and environment back to a level of homeostasis, but mostly because of the unfair and overly liberal manner in which my life, as a human resource and not a human being, has been treated. I hold my life more dear than someone else’s economic success for which I feel no responsibility in so far as I should not have to sacrifice my life for it.

This election will be as significant as that of 2008 for me. May the best woman or man win.

Obama’s birth origins vs Donald Trump…

2011-04-27T20:25:00.001-04:00

I have to thank President Obama for ending the gossip about his birth. At least they were not denying his legitimacy. I hardly believed the man would deceive an entire Nation by defrauding his birth when his election is so important to the future of African Americans. No man could get up every morning and look himself in the mirror having committed such a deception.

I do believe Donald Trump was more or less putting on an act while being sincere about his concerns for the future of America. He is amongst millions and I have no doubts that he could turn this country around and put us back in the black economically, if he ran for office.

I won’t vote for him unless he gets a haircut.

They’re going to raise taxes now?

2011-04-16T14:28:00.001-04:00

After giving everyone a stimulus check, except me and others like me who have outstanding college loans, they want to now raise taxes. Taking back that nice stimulus check and more, something they should never have done, although I am sure people were pleased to have it, but now they have to give it back and times are harder than they were. Does that seem fair to the American people. Our leaders seem to forget who they are working for and it becomes a battle of personalities (some that should be evaluated before they take office) rather than a meeting of the minds to benefit the nation as a whole.

How many true Republicans are out there? There is only a small portion of the population that are independently wealthy. They are not the majority.

Obama’s birth certificate issue…

2011-04-16T14:19:00.001-04:00

…what they didn’t say was, it’s an attempt to keep Republican’s out of the White House. Every capitalist wants liberal spending.

Can you believe this?

2011-04-15T15:02:00.001-04:00

I received this letter today. These people want me to stay mentally ill and in poverty another year in order to write off my college loan which I cannot pay in full? They want to keep milking me for stories. I have a problem with this, I am not stopping anything I am doing and I intend making it a legal issue if necessary. This is covert oppression.

In 1990 before I went to prison I applied for a loan to go back to college. I did attempt two classes, psychology and physics, that’s when I saw the pyroclastic cloud which I sketched into my notebook. I clearly recollect this because the Professor was discussing alcoholism and AA and I disagreed with what he was saying about the problem and about AA. I can’t produce the notebook because it was stolen (evidence), just as my diary was stolen, and just as a lot of other property I had has been stolen (tangible property), evidence to the fact. I was smart enough at that point to have copied my diary as I was not clear who or what was going on. As it happened things did not go well for me and Susan W. Becker and I went to prison first for 3 months, then again for 5 months after taking my mother’s car to escape being left alone with her husband, which I now discover is someone else’s baggage. I had been in Pitt Memorial on the psychiatric unit for 3 months after planning to commit suicide, via various means which I have recently discovered were part of some historical account someone was trying to collect at my expense. I am not a Hollywood actress. I did not learn of Katherine Gibbs until sometime in 2004, who used the stage name Kay Francis, her husband’s mother or grandmother I can’t say for sure.

What this all boils down to is this, I was hospitalized at Pitt Memorial for those three months without insurance. I was suicidal at the time and I was mentally ill which I denied before the first Social Security evaluation panel in February of 1990 in which I was happily turned down for disability. That was fine with me I was not complaining and happy to go about my life. The truth is, I had been mentally ill nearly all my life, I simply was not made aware of it, even after treatment in 1972 at Tideland Mental Health. The truth is, I was so busy acting out that I never stopped to reflect on how crazy and insane my life had been up to that point. From 1987 to 1989 I was in treatment at Tideland Mental Health, I was involved in a 10 week alcohol abuse program, I attended AA, I was enrolled in the community college where I took two psychology courses, I was employed at the Beaufort County Hospital and I was in psychotherapy at which time my childhood molestation issues came up, during which time I told the psychologist, Bob Hudson, I felt fragmented. I had no idea what fragmented was in psychological terms but that is what came from my mouth. In July of 1989 I had a breakdown and was hospitalized. I was not aware until near the end of my hospitalization that some of my problems came from the sexual abuse by two lesbians and one male MP Officer during my military enlistment. Then the Psychiatrist, just before discharging me, threatened me with the hospital bill, which had been repressed and dissociated during the 3 months due to enmeshments with the other patients. I was never aware of this either. While at the hospital I met Helen Spear and Susan W. Becker. They were acquainted with each other before I arrived. Both had engaged in self mutilating behavior.

After moving in with Ms. Becker I learned she had been married and divorced from a man who was indirectly involved with Hollywood. She had gone to California with $12,000 given to her by her father, then ended up homeless and living in the woods with Smith. And there were many other details I won’t go into. After several weeks Becker decided to leave the hospital against medical advice and even showed me the paper they gave her stating this, which now seems rather suspicious. I never left against medical advice and Carma Cox, an employee there, can attest to this fact, although I should have stayed as I was not aware of the true nature of the events that were unraveling in my life at that time and needed the treatment, but had no money or insurance.

After a week at home Becker began her self mutilating behavior which shocked me as I found her in the bathroom with a bleeding wrist one afternoon after I had returned from being out. It was also during this time I had filed applications for grants and had made arrangements to go back to college. Going back to college had been my goal since leaving in 1974. I had made previous attempts in 1975, 1976 that lasted 1 year and again in 1979, all a matter of record. Becker said she could help me get disability, I simply had no idea how she was going to go about it, what her plan was or what her intent was at the time. Had I known I would have stopped what she was doing to me so I could get it as best I can deduce. She was also concerned that I had used her address in filing for college assistance as she was renting the room to me and had to others against HUD regulations. Another matter of which I wanted no part. She felt her family had been wronged during the 1970’s oil crisis that forced them into bankruptcy. In February I told Becker I was going to move because I could not handle her mutilating behavior and that things were getting too complicated. Her behavior escalated and I found myself wanting to cut on myself. I had engaged in this behavior briefly while in college but fought my way out of it. The situation grew more complicated and after a physical encounter in which she assaulted me and accused me of trying to take her 19 year old daughter from her, I took out charges on her which made her more angry. I ended up exploding and damaged property in her home. She had me arrested and I went to prison, she went to a psychiatric hospital in Asheville, NC.

During my incarceration they sent a Psychiatrist, Dr. Griggs, to evaluate me. I was not aware he was from Social Security as I had been evaluated by Dr. Stebbins, Dr. Sellers, Dr. Shalom, Dr. Karam and several psychologists prior to this. Dr. Sellers is the only one who gave me a favorable evaluation. They over stated my problem and sent a copy to my mother scaring her and when I was released she had me committed to Cherry Hospital. I was there for 7 days and they said they saw nothing wrong with me. It was only at this time that I learned I had been awarded disability benefits. I bought a car and left my hometown. I lived in my car for 7 months and was in and out of motels. I lost my car and lived on the streets for roughly a month before getting into a shelter. This went on until 1998 and I had many psychiatric hospitalizations and several incarcerations, all a matter of record which I have in my possession, during that time as well.

In 1992, after a visit to the VA I was told they could give me a pension as I was unable to make it on the $450.00 I was getting at the time. I received the benefits and had them stopped in 1998 for several years, as I had attempted employment during that time. I lost my job and then made a request to have the pension reinstated. I applied for housing assistance which I received and finally got my own place. In 1997 I had been sent to prison again for traffic issues. I took overdoses of pills as Becker had been doing the same and as had my mother during my childhood and was basically going down hill. I managed to stay away from alcohol pretty much. I knew I needed to have my wits about me.

From 1999 to the present, I began to gain more insight into what had been happening to me. I had attended Mental Health again briefly but I had become so distrustful that it was uncomfortable and angered me more to listen to their dribble as I felt they had willfully ignored my mental condition and that of my family in 1972.

Finally in my own place, I made the mistake of playing too much music and watching too much television, all habits of my parents. I was threatened with institutionalization if I did not stop the excessive music and sold most of my collection. I cannot tell you who did it, but I heard it and heeded what was said. I had read Joseph Murphy’s book, Power of the Subconscious Mind in the 80’s but I had forgotten most of it, mainly because of all the other garbage in my head that pushed that knowledge into the background or it was repressed and dissociated as was some of the other information I attempted to learn and utilize in my life that others have managed to gain benefit from rather than myself.

In 2000 I was flooded out of my apartment. I had to get medication at that time and had been taking Valproic Acid. I moved still yet another time. The person who generously put me up in 1998 was a music major and listened mainly to classical music. I have since tried to wean myself from music for a time, for reasons of mental health. I began reading books on psychoanalysis and psychology. Through these books I learned that I was not solely responsible for my situation, that I had been the victim of projections and projective identification. My mother was an avid viewer of soap operas and watched television frequently when I was an infant. I can even recall her listening to the Lone Ranger and Edge of Night on the radio. I could not recollect the things she had seen on the television mainly because they had become the content of the mind and I acted out almost all the time as I had never been breast fed. It then became clear, due to this deficit in my development that I had been a victim of many of the female relationships I was involved in, not that they often intended this, they nor I were aware of the drive which had not been satiated during my infancy, but had been quelled with a bottle.

Also during this time I recollected Joseph Murphy’s book and also Tony Robbins’ books I had read and purchased them again. I was terribly upset with myself that I had not recollected these books and fell into another depression and soon became suicidal again. This is the emotional coping pattern that developed in my family, my father having taken his own life in 1974.

In 1998, after being in prison from September 1997-January 1998, I purchased a computer with inheritance money from my Aunt’s death. During the incarceration I had been medicated and then sent to NCCIW in Raleigh where I was, what I consider, abused once again. I was returned to FCCW and placed in solitary for the majority of time where I drew and wrote and was finally sent to a dorm where I drew and slept most of the time. Because of all I had been through including the numerous overdoses, anesthesia from a surgery and forced medications I was given in prison, I had absolutely no recollection of the college loan I had taken out in 1990, otherwise I would have gladly paid the damn thing off when I received the disability back pay which happened to be the sum of $12,000, the amount Becker stated she had been given by her father when she left home to go to Davis in California. By the time I got out of prison the first time, I was completely devoid of any trust in another human being and am so now.

Having gotten my sister to bring me my computer, I purchased internet service and thus began my education in computers and cyberspace. I continued to read. One day, by chance, I connected the construction of the opening in the wall between my living area and kitchen of my apartment to Milbank Prison. Then while out shopping at Barnes and Noble I happened onto books by Sarah Waters, Tipping the Velvet and the other about Milbank Prison. Things started to come together about what had been happening to me. I connected Milbank Prison to my prison experience. I then discovered the Harry Potter books which I connected to Bewitched and other television programs I have viewed in my youth and found dialogue related to an Indiana Jones Adventure film. This is where my Money and Prosperity tape by Barrie Konicov went to which I listened to in 1995 while living with my mother after getting out of jail in Wake County. It had been dissociated. All of the incarcerations and traumas were to affect a dissociation. After my first incarceration I began institutionalizing myself and setting up my incarcerations, this of course was all unconscious behavior at the time but I learned it was called an orienting response to a programmed trigger. That means that when a particular trigger is activated in my mind I will seek to institutionalize or incarcerate myself.

In 1993 I had placed an ad in the News and Observer for someone to assist me in writing about my prison experience, as I was not knowledgeable on publishing. I sent out letters to 6 different writers, AK Dowling was one of them, but I never communicated to her that I was interested in her assistance. I had chosen to ask Vinegar but as it turned out that never happened.

Back to about 2005, I then found and purchased books on psi, Mind to Mind, Mental Suggestion and Dream Telepathy where I discovered Calvin Hall had conducted experiments along with a Van De Castle, in which Mr. Van de Castle came to Chapel Hill, NC where I how reside and via Calvin Hall, proceeded to conduct psi experiments, in which he claimed he saw a boxing ring and boxing match. It was during that same year, 1972, that I and several classmates (three witnesses) made a trip to UNC in Chapel Hill to view the campus. I know it was the fall of 1972 because three guys we met during that time, visited me and another classmate for our birthdays as they were only three days apart in November. In 1973 just before I graduated high school, my father, whose mother also happens to be a Hall, punched me in the face breaking my nose, which I now contribute to our having been enmeshed in the experiment conducted by Hall and Van de Castle. My father did view boxing matches in the early 60’s but lost his central vision in 1964 and never viewed the television again. He also abused alcohol so those memories might have no longer been as strong. Not being able to see it would ahve bene impossible for him to reinforce those memories. He never received money from Katherine Gibbs nor a Seeing Eye Dog from the institute she bequeathed the majority of her money. Hall’s experiments are all of record.

Learning of this I was able to connect an experience I had in college in 1973 with a student of psychology doing his graduate work, to Calvin. Hall. I had been given a Rorschach test by the grad student in which I claimed I saw a tiger. I had smoked a small amount of marijuana, given to me before the test. I did it to see what would happen. In 1988 while in Beaufort County, I had need for surgery and was recuperating at home. Paxton, a minister from my hometown area came to visit me and brought me a copy of Calvin and Hobbes, a kind of comic book. I knew nothing of Calvin Hall at that time so did not associate the book with him. If there was suppose to be a message delivered in the delivery of that book, I did not get it as I did not have knowledge of who he was at that time. I also later discovered there was a Hall who was an Art student at the same college I was attending. It is clear now I was re-enacting some of his, Calvin’s and Jerry’s history (jumping in the fountain at ECU), persons unknown to me at the time.

By the time I did get my apartment in 1999, I was so mentally and emotionally exhausted I could not think clearly, rather I was beyond exhaustion. So you can see, as things have unfolded and become more clear, I have become a bit more “normal” or aware of what has happened to me. Am I more sane? That would depend on with whom I am connected and what their habits are, not that it is my intent on being connected to anyone for this purpose, as I have never profited from any of these things that have happened to me, others have and not in my behalf if they claim it as that was never made known to me either.

I have proven this repeatedly and I suspect it is all part of a larger picture, a ploy to use me and people like me at the expense of the Federal Government, for revenge, to discover the content of the mind, to write books and movies and any other means of profiting that can be had from the trashing of another’s life. Any profitable ideas I might have had were taken out as well and I am left with nothing but anger and rage at a system who would rather defend thieves. By that I mean they are using my disability, against my wishes, which started in my infancy without my knowledge or consent, in that not having been breast fed I can locate things easier than someone who has been breast fed, or better said I can be exploited more easily than others who were breast fed during their infancy. I have been easily exploited in other ways as well. This all basically feeds off my disability, which will never truly be corrected without inflicting more harm. It’s just suppressed.

There is much more to my story. I venture to say that I nor any of my family members have been what one might call “sane”, well except my mother who denies any such illness and shed her baggage onto me so she had not had to contend with it. I find little fault with her as she was not aware of the influence that machine called the television had on the human mind, let alone anything about her mind. Neither of my parents were learned people or even knew of subliminal messaging. My bitterness is with the industries who have chosen to take advantage of our innocence, our ignorance and our minds. I am also aware I have been prevented by various means from pursuing any legal assistance in order to obtain relief from this harassment.

They have used tactics from, “you owe me a novel”, to threats on my life trying to dissociate my mind (this has been validated by the Veterans Administration) to get a book or movie out of me.

The above is just a brief account of what happened to me after obtaining the loan which has now accrued a substantial amount of interest, why I also had a problem when I received a letter from them as they were only agreeable to reducing the interest if I paid a specified amount in full which I was unable to do. The University has the money I borrowed, I have not banked it anywhere. I don’t own property or have any assets. And, this is not the first trouble I have had, it all started when Jesse Helms croaked those infamous words, “No Free Lunches”. If I had been left alone, I would have gotten my degree in 1973, I would have been gainfully employed and we all would be happier.

Calendar of Nuclear Accidents

2011-04-11T02:02:00.001-04:00

Talk about CO2 emissions? Can the environment truly stand any more contamination? It is passed being insane to continue using nuclear energy to sustain our power needs.

Calendar of Nuclear Accidents

Look at the costs to the economy…

2011-04-11T02:01:00.001-04:00

List of nuclear power plants in America

Not buying this explanation…

2011-04-06T18:35:00.001-04:00

A Brain Protein Gone Awry Provides Schizophrenia Clue : Shots - Health Blog : NPR

…for autism at least. I still say not breast feeding and the length of time breast feeding occurs is at the root of many of the brain dysfunctions especially in autistic children. No breast milk, no normal brain development. At least this is the case with me. My brain is far smaller than my brother’s who was breast fed for a short period of time. I was given cow’s milk and I have developed all kinds of addictions to the abnormal levels of amino acids found in milk. I’m lucky I don’t have many of the diseases associated with the consumption of cow’s milk at birth. I stopped using milk when I got older, drank it only occasionally and stopped using it altogether after I turned 18 except for the sporadic use of it in coffee. While there are similarities in breast milk and cow’s milk, cow’s milk was intended by nature for calves not humans, so I’ve been told and so I have read numerous times. Calves develop far quicker than a human baby. Who would argue that? I developed diarrhea and other digestive problems associated with the consumption of cow’s milk that were treated with paregoric.

8-9 grams of cow’s milk contains nearly two grams of glutamic acid, almost 500 mgs of phenylalanine and almost 500 mgs of tyrosine. 2 grams of glutamic acid is too much for me as an adult, you can imagine what it could do to an infant, why I resorted to taking only the essential amino acids for several years. Too much glutamic acid can cause serious neurological damage. Depending on how much tyrosine an infant’s body can produce from phenylalanine plus what’s already in the milk, is a significant amount. How efficient is a baby’s body at breaking down protein and converting it into the enzymes necessary to convert amino acids to glucose? I’d deduce that they are not very efficient as the infant is still developing. I have also read in numerous medical journals and articles that tyrosine and dopamine are neurotransmitters involved in schizophrenia.

There have been numerous legal actions against companies for their use of glutamate which is a derivative of glutamic acid and aspartate derived from aspartic acid. There is over 600 mgs of aspartic acid in cow’s milk. If an adult is harmed by too much of the small levels in aspartame and other products surely 600 mgs is far too much for an infant as well.

Taurine is another amino acid that could cause a problem. While it is also in breast milk it is in much lower quantities than that contained in cow’s milk. Taurine has been shown to block the release of hormones from the pituitary gland among other things.

Plaques are another issue. I’ve have met two people who are suffering from an inability to walk due to plaques. It is horrific. One of the ladies claimed it was from drinking too much cow’s milk. I had to help her get into and out of the bathroom in a restaurant. She was confined to a wheel chair and walker.

I have a friend who is diagnosed as a schizophrenic. He drinks a good amount of milk and eats a lot of beef. I was dismayed when I discovered the RDA for amino acids for adults. Maybe there is a reason those levels are so low? For a person of my age, weight and height I should not consume more than 9.5 grams of just the essential amino acids daily. The body can make glutamic acid and all of the other non-essential amino acids from the essentials.

I recall several articles in which the Federal Government supported the use of cow’s milk instead of breast feeding.

Decide for yourself.

We the people no longer live in a Democracy…

2011-03-31T15:03:00.001-04:00

He who controls the money controls the country. The 10 temple priests who now control billions of dollars are at the top. They, plus the many wealthy below them make up the capitalists. They and others like Buffet and Gates control most of the money. The Government is now under their control or should we politically say, their powerful influence. They have decided we the people are not competent enough to decide what is best for ourselves. Without some financial security one cannot think clearly as one’s brain is focused on survival. Here is where the poor working class and middle class (bourgeiosie) get duped, while trying to raise Christian children who are law abiding and honest. They will be the inheritors of the thieves who took 150 billion dollars from American citizens.

It seems, since we the people supposedly run the country, that we are really struggling against ourselves. Hardly. We are struggling against the technology used to control us, television, radio and internet. This is covert communism, not readily detectable by the average viewer or listener. Many are like me and my family who grew up during the birth of the machine, the television. Enthralled and amazed with this electronic box that could receive an image from thousands of miles away, it kept us entertained night after night (as if we were rich Greeks and Romans with nothing better to do than be entertained), influenced our buying decisions and informed us of what was going on in the country. We generally believe what we see in the news or hear on the radio. It was not until I viewed Adam Curtis’ Century of the Self, Noam Chomsky’s Manufactured Consent, and listened to Richard Brodie’s Virus of the Mind, that I started to view things in a very different way. In addition to this, films and various books I read forced me to take a different view of what I had been doing in the past and that I was not as guilty of bringing about the various crises in my life of which I had, on occasion, been charged. I had inherited all that my parents had viewed and the habit of doing the same, against which I still struggle on a daily basis. And, I was made impotent to defend myself against these things because of what I had viewed. I had been brainwashed.

It’s your choice? Hardly, it’s your choice based on what they have pre-programmed into your mind and brain if you have spent many hours viewing and listening to this machine. It’s a synaptic attack like connecting the dots in a picture book when you were a child. You connect all the dots until you form a picture. Connect all the synapses and you get a thought, an idea, a decision. It is your choice on that which you wish your synapses to fire away.

How do you discern what is intended as propaganda and what is intended to inform us? A popular movie from Hollywood will likely get your attention and with all the memes floating around, you are more likely influenced to view it than watch Chomsky’s three hour saga about how they use these memes, get you to view the movie and get away with it.

So what do we do to defend ourselves? View Chomsky’s film, read Virus of the Mind, read educational material, stayed informed. Choose how you spend your time when you are not working. Support each other. Informed voting is another way of helping to make changes. Voice your concerns to your elected officials. Make sure they are speaking in your behalf. Know where you are putting your hard earned dollars. Find out what they are doing with those dollars. Keep track of Government spending, we are all entitled to copies of the State and Federal budgets. Stop supporting that which is poisoning your mind.

We talk about CO2 emissions and greenhouse gases…

2011-03-29T13:14:00.001-04:00

What about the poisons from failed nuclear power plants and nuclear weapons testing?

What is plutonium used for?

Plutonium-239 is used to make nuclear weapons. For example, the bomb dropped on Nagasaki, Japan, in 1945, contained Pu-239. The plutonium in the bomb undergoes fission in an arrangement that assures enormous energy generation and destructive potential.
The isotope, plutonium-238, is not useful for nuclear weapons. However it generates significant heat through its decay process, which make it useful as a long-lived power source. Using a thermocouple, a device that converts heat into electric power, satellites rely on plutonium as a power source. Tiny amounts also provide power to heart pacemakers.
Some foreign countries mix isotopes of plutonium and uranium to manufacture special reactor fuel called mixed-oxide fuel, for commercial nuclear power reactors. The plutonium increases the power output. The U.S. does not currently manufacture mixed-oxide fuel, but is funding research in this type of reactor fuel as a means of dealing with excess plutonium in U.S. stockpiles.
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Exposure to Plutonium

How does plutonium get into the environment?

Plutonium was dispersed world wide from atmospheric testing of nuclear weapons conducted during the 1950s and ‘60s. The fallout from these tests left very low concentrations of plutonium in soils around the world.
Nuclear weapons production and testing facilities (Hanford, WA; Savannah River, GA; Rocky Flats, CO; and The Nevada Test Site, in the United States, and Mayak and Semi Plafinsk in the former Soviet Union), also released small amounts. Some releases have occurred in accidents with nuclear weapons, the reentry of satellites that used Pu-238, and from the Chernobyl nuclear reactor accident.
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How does plutonium change in the environment?

All isotopes of plutonium undergo radioactive decay. As plutonium decays, it releases radiation and forms other radioactive isotopes. For example, Pu-238 emits an alpha particle and becomes uranium-234; Pu-239 emits an alpha particle and becomes uranium-235.
This process happens slowly since the half-lives of plutonium isotopes tend to be relatively long: Pu-238 has a half-life of 87.7 years; Pu-239 has a half-life is 24,100 years, and Pu-240 has a half-life of 6,560 years. The decay process continues until a stable, non-radioactive element is formed.
Plutonium | Radiation Protection | US EPA

Iodine | Radiation Protection | US EPA

2011-03-29T02:54:00.001-04:00

The detonation of nuclear weapons also releases iodine-129 into the environment. Atmospheric testing in the 1950's and 60's released radioactive iodine to the atmosphere which has disseminated around the world, and is now found at very low levels in the environment. Most I-129 in the environment came from weapons testing.

Iodine | Radiation Protection | US EPA

2011-03-29T02:52:00.001-04:00

Iodine-129 has a half-life of 15.7 million years; iodine-131 has a half-life of about 8 days. Both emit beta particles upon radioactive decay.

Iodine | Radiation Protection | US EPA

The Earth is behaving in a way now…

2011-03-29T02:31:00.001-04:00

…with so many earthquakes and tsunamis, hurricanes and other natural disasters which are so unpredictable, I think we should do away with nuclear power altogether. It might be safe but who can predict with 100 percent surety that something like what has already happened won’t happen again. Who can predict with surety when a tornado might hit some reactor, or some terrorist plot, or god knows what might fall out of the sky and land on one of them? I can’t believe after Three Mile Island, they are still messing around with this stuff. Courting a disaster worse than we already have in Japan.

Tempting fate was never my idea of proving myself and I don’t think it’s a smart one. Now if the damned radiation doesn’t kill half the country, the stress of it happening again will.

World Nuclear Reactor Standards and Inspection…

2011-03-29T02:10:00.001-04:00

WHY DO WE NOT HAVE THIS?

Nuclear Power Plants and Earthquakes

2011-03-29T01:51:00.001-04:00

In March 2011 eleven operating nuclear power plants shut down automatically during the major earthquake. Three of these subsequently caused an INES Level 5 Accident due to loss of power leading to loss of cooling.

Nuclear Power Plants and Earthquakes

What happened this time?

2011-03-29T01:48:00.001-04:00

In 1995, the closest nuclear power plants, some 110 km north of Kobe, were unaffected by the severe Kobe-Osaka earthquake, but in 2004, 2005, 2007 and 2009 Japanese reactors shut down automatically due to ground acceleration exceeding their trip settings.

Nuclear Power Plants and Earthquakes